The Girl in the Mirror (Harry Styles fanfic)

Chapter 85

Chapter 85

Louis' POV

My hand shakes as I pick up the champagne flute and I drink the entire contents in one. I'm nervous and I'm trying my best to calm down, but nothing is working. I pace around just thinking about everything and the more I think, the more reality sets in. This is it, today is the big day. Today is going to be the best day of my life, it's my wedding day. I am marrying the love of my life and I have been up since 5am shitting myself at that fact. I have been nervous before, I mean I have performed in front of thousands of people, but none of that made me feel as nervous as I feel right now. I would go as far as saying that nervous is an understatement at the moment. I'm sure it's normal to be this nervous isn't it? I know everything has been planned to military position, but what if something goes wrong? What if the entire day is a disaster and Eleanor hates me for it? I have so much doubt in my mind that I don't even know if I am doing the right thing by marrying her in such a hurry.

I grab another champagne flute and again I drink it in one as well. I've lost count of how many I have had so far. I was hoping they would ease my nerves, they haven't though. I don't think anything will ease them today. I feel a hand on my shoulder and my dad Mark smiles down at me. "Are you nervous?" he asks. I just nod and I look away from him again. Zayn walks into the room placing his lighter back in his pocket. I stare at him wishing I'd had more involvement in planning the wedding, I didn't even get to pick the suits. I just wrote the cheques and I let Eleanor and the wedding planner get on with it. I stand up and I walk over to pour myself another glass of champagne, just one more then I will be ok. Zayn gives me a strange look "I don't think you should have another mate" he says. I knock back the glass I have just poured and I decide to take his advice to not have anymore. "Are you ready?" he asks me and I shake my head. I'm not ready, I'm not ready to do this. He looks at me worriedly "I know you're nervous, but you'll be fine once you see her" he says not making me feel any better. I am terrified and I have no idea why.

"The car is here" my dad says walking back into the room. Well I say dad he isn't my real dad, but he brought me up and is the closest thing I will ever have to a real dad. "You ok?" Zayn asks me. I nod and I follow them both out of my house. The warm air outside hits me as I step out of the door and then I realise I have drank too much. I'm not drunk, but I am on my way. Eleanor will be fuming if she sees me like this, I just hope the drive to the hotel sobers me up. My whole body shakes as I climb into the back of the car. Surely I shouldn't be this nervous to be marrying the only woman I have ever loved. I just think the pressure has all got too much for me and this has all been so rushed. I don't think I have had chance to get used to this fully yet. I just have to keep telling myself I will be ok once I see her beautiful face. I will know it's right then, it will feel right then.

"The paparazzi are out in force today" Zayn says as we head to the hotel. "What?" I ask him. "The paparazzi outside yours taking all the pictures" he says. I must be out of it because I don't even remember seeing them or taking notice of them. I must be drunker than I thought. I can imagine if the paparazzi outside my house was bad then at the venue it will be ten times worse. "This is a plush car" my dad says. I didn't even take notice of what kind of car I am in, how bad is that? "What kind of car is it?" I ask my dad. He looks at my confused "A black Bentley" he says. I nod and I stare straight ahead. "Are you ok son?" my dad asks. No, I'm not ok! I just nod though because I can't tell anyone about how I feel, they would never understand. I know who would understand, the person who should have been my best man. Harry. I can't help feeling regretful that I asked Zayn in the end even though he has been a good best man. I should have chosen my best friend and the person I have been through the most with over the years. I know Harry won't admit it and he pretends it is all ok, but he is hurt that I didn't choose him. He wouldn't make me feel bad about the stupid, rash decision I made. I sit in silence for the rest of the car journey and thankfully my dad and Zayn do as well. I fidget constantly with my cuffs and my hair. I just need to see her then this will all be ok.