Then She Came

Newt 2

I couldn't get it out of my head. Her yelling. I didn't know how she found out. I don't know why someone would tell her what had really happened. Alby had said no. I wasn't lying there. I just didn't tell the whole truth. I had said no too. 

I didn't know what to say. I couldn't tell her the real reason behind why I had decided to tell her Alby said no. But that's because I didn't know. I spoke on instinct and then stuck with it. Maybe I am a bad person for it. 

I had this feeling that she was supposed to be apart of something bigger than the Glade and the Maze. That she wasn't actually supposed to be here. That her coming here was a mistake. Something told me that it was wrong, she was sent here on accident. I didn't want the Creator's to send a Griever after her to fix their "accident." 

But when she came, it felt like every day was a little bit easier to get through. It no longer felt like there was no sun, no hope. If I couldn't find a way out for myself, then I could find a way out for myself. I thought it would make it easier. 

But then, every time I was back in the Maze, I felt trapped again, like I was supposed to. But I was frightened every time I turned a corner. I was scared about what would be waiting on the other side. 

I didn't want her to experience that feeling. The feeling that kept me up at night. The feeling that reappeared in my nightmares when I did sleep. 

Greiver's chased me through the endless Maze in my sleep. Except the only difference was that where the Glade should have been, it was just a pile of bones and wood. I wouldn't find a safe haven there. 

I knew what I was doing when I raced off into the Maze when no one was looking. I took one last look at the Glade, my home before turning and running back in. 

I knew I wasn't coming out of the Maze alive. 

I still felt scared every time I raced around a corner. I knew what I was going out to do, but part of me didn't want to do it. 

Eventually, the stone walls and green ivy started to look the same. The thick ivy felt foreign in my hands as I pulled on it to make sure it would hold my weight so I could climb high enough. And then I went up, pulling myself up limb by limb. 

The muscles in my arms burned. I ignored it. My feet were sore. I fought the urge to look down until I was more than halfway up the wall. 

It was high enough, the fall. It would kill me. 

Millions of thoughts flew threw my mind. Thoughts of Alby, Minho, Ben and I sitting in the map room, all laughing together as we worked on the latest patterns in the Maze. Thoughts of eating Fry Pan's delicious bacon every time a new Greenie came up. 

Thoughts of the dark-haired girl with a pound of sass on her shoulders as she worked away in the infirmary. A place she didn't want to be. 

I gripped the ivy tighter in my hands, feeling the raw skin on my palms and fingers. They stung. The stone beneath my feet suddenly broke away and I slipped, the ivy cutting into my skin as I gripped it tightly to stop my fall. I had to go a few feet higher. 

Blood ran down my arms in a slow, steady stream as I forced my hand to reach up higher. Each grip sent pain shuddering through my arms. 

It didn't matter if I survived the fall, a Griever would come along eventually and finish me off. Not how I wanted to die but how it might have to be. 

And then, without any second thoughts, I pushed off the wall, jumping into the air. 

The fall felt like it was taking forever, air rushed past my ears, my heart jumped into my throat. But the only sound in my head was the sound of Maya's laughter. Laughter bubbling out from her stomach as she laughed at something that Minho had said. Then Minho's was added in, giddy like a child's but soothing all the same. Then soon followed by Alby's deep rare chuckle. Ben came next, his laughter that always seemed to brighten the room immensely.

The laughing grew louder until I couldn't hear anything else. I couldn't hear the air rushing, or my blood pounding in my ears. 

I was feet away from the ground when I decided that I didn't want to die anymore. Not like this. I wanted to go out fighting.

And then I hit the ground, my leg crushing under me as I collapsed to the ground and let out a yell. The excruciating pain in my leg made it hard to stay awake after my head hit the concrete. The edges of my vision started to blur together as I felt tears slip out of my eyes. I cried because I knew that I had made the biggest mistake of my entire life. And it would cost me my life.

"I'm sorry." I had tried to say, like Maya, who didn't know that I lay crumpled on the floor of the Maze, could hear me. Or maybe I said it to myself. 

Then all I could see was black and all I could hear was blook pounding in my ears.

Then there was nothing.