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after dark, the sombre shade of night gives me room to think, room to brood on things. it was after dark that your face became clearer, a stubborn image of fictional happiness that i could only experience in dreams.
so it feels like a dream come true when the two of us are sprawled on my bed, talking about anything under the star-lit sky.
laughing, you sat up straight on the bed, saying that you’d go brush up and sleep on the couch.
i let you go, and collapsed back onto my bed, hoping to drift into slumber. hours passed, and i still didn’t feel tired enough for my eyes to close.
at two in the morning, i sneaked out of bed and headed to the couch, where your hand was draped over its side, contented snores escaping your lips.
the winter night was hard to bear, and i suddenly remember that you were extremely weak to the cold. so it came to no surprise that you abruptly curled into a ball, attempting to shield yourself from the cruel chill.
frowning, i tapped your shoulder, and it didn’t take long for you to peep up at me with half-lidded chocolate eyes.
what? you growled, slightly grumpy.
i raised a brow, arms folded. you look cold. sleep with me.
you shook your head, adamant to my demand. i’d just snatch your blanket. you’d be twice as cold.
memories of my stay at your house flooded my mind, especially of your peaceful sleeping face, giving opportunity for heat to creep up my skin.
just come. i sighed, grabbing your wrist and half-dragging you to my room, not allowing you to see my surely-red face.
i shoved you under the covers and made sure you were neck-deep in them for guranteed warmth before crawling in beside you.
night. i said quickly, and turned away from you, unwilling to stare at your face and hands under my pillow for extra comfort.
the dark gave me time to force my eyes closed and drag myself into void dreams of white and black.
the next time i opened my them, it was still dark, but it was much colder than before, and i surpressed chattering teeth out of fear that i’d disturb you.
turned out that i didn’t need to worry after all, as you were already awake, moonlight from the window illuminating your silhouette.
i don’t know why, but something urged me to squeeze my eyes shut and regulate my breathing as much as i could to make it seem like i was still sleeping.
but still, i opened an eye, a slithered window so that i could still make out the shape of you pooling your portion of the blanket and comforter in your hands.
with a gentle grace, you smoothed them over me to create a second layer of warmth and protection. sighing, you sat back, satisfied, the stars casting their light faithfully on your lineaments.
at that moment, i had never felt warmer, more loved, and more misled by the illusion of us, than ever before.
the urge to kiss you just overwhelms me. the dark gives me time to think, to brood about you; you don’t give me time to think about anything, save for the teasing smiles and the bundle of feelings that only you could give me.
at least the dark helped me this time. clouds passed over the stars and moon, and your face was shrouded in darkness again.
i don’t know why, but you laid back down and whispered for nobody to hear, your breath releasing into the cold air, coiling and fading with every word you said.
