The seat of my jeans is stained from the dirt below. My cotton blouse catches on the chipped edges of rocks. The small pebbles dig into the skin of my lower back.
These things all cause great discomfort, but I hardly notice. With Henry straddled over me and his lips attached to my neck, I can barely feel the twigs poking at my side and the ant crawling up my wrist.
I think about the marks I'll have and decide to move him back up to my lips, which he doesn't seem to mind. He presses his hips to mine, forcing a small squeak from my throat. Right now, all the anger and hurt from the people in my life doesn't matter.
Right now, I am here. And I am with him. This is all that matters right now.
As his tongue parts my lips, I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him closer. Henry slips his arms under me and pulls us up so we're both kneeling.
His hands move down to my waist, resting on the skin under my blouse.
My first kiss was in the seventh grade with tan and cool Frankie Rodriguez. I didn't know the first thing about the opposite sex, let alone how to kiss. Everyone knew they wanted it, but no one knew why. So at the school dance, while I sat on the girls' side of the gymnasium, all I could hear were the whispers of my fellow females.
"Do you think Alex will ask me to dance?"
"I hope Daniel comes over here."
I had simply gone to the dance because my father had a woman over and most women he brought over didn't care to have a lanky twelve year old ruining the mood. So there I was, drinking a root beer from the bottle, something my elderly reading teacher said: "is not very lady-like, Lorraine."
Suddenly, the whispers stopped for a millisecond and then started up in a frenzy.
"It's Frankie."
"He's coming over here!"
"Oh, I hope he asks me to dance,"
I was looking at my shoes when another pair stopped in front of them. I looked up and met his eyes. He had kind eyes and the most perfect smile you've ever seen. "Do you want to dance with me?" He asked politely. But I knew this wasn't really a question. If Frankie Rodriguez asked you to dance, you got your sorry ass up to dance.
And so I did. I took his hand and felt a blush warm on my cheeks. I couldn't believe my luck. He actually wanted to dance with me. All the girls and he chose me.
I felt his hands on the small of my back, making my palms sweat. I instinctively placed my hands on his shoulders and swayed to some Pat Benetar song.
We danced for three songs and even though it was the same thing over and over, I didn't mind.
Then at the end of an REO Speedwagon tune, he moved in and planted his lips on mine for a good five seconds. It set my skin on fire and for a second, my only worry was if we were going to get into trouble. We didn't, but that didn't slow down my pounding heart. My eyes were wide open the whole time, but he was relaxed and had his closed. When he pulled away, he finished swaying with me until the song finished. When it did, he said, "See ya," Then he let me go and walked back to his side of the gym with a smirk on his face.
I stood in the middle of the room, not moving. Although I was frozen in place, my thoughts raced and my head was spinning.
One of the chaperones saw me standing in the middle of the floor and ushered me back to my side. I sat down and immediately, the girls crowded around me, asking what it was like and how I felt.
I told them exactly how I was feeling.
"It's hot in here," And that was it. That night, as Charlie was asleep, I stared at the ceiling and I wondered; what if I never feel, in my whole life, the way did when I was with him?
