Everything we never said

Chapter seventeen - Many hands make light work

Alexander fusses with the car seat, he pulls and moves it side to side for more than ten minutes. I rock slowly with my daughter in my arms, it feels like I've been rocking since labour. I remain patient even though I'm dying to leave this place.

I miss my kitty.

"We good?" I ask with a frown, it's been over a week since the birth but I'm not operating at full speed just yet.

The infection really knocked me around.

"Hmm, I don't know..... I don't think it's supposed to move this much" Alexander mumbles and looks at the instructions once more.
"Hey, daddy? It's fine. It's been certified and everything, just leave it be" I smirk at his protectiveness.
"Okay, yeah" he frowns and nods. "I'm being ridiculous"
"You're being thorough, and just a little fastidious" I smile up at his big sexy face and kiss his jaw.
"I'll drive slow" Alexander licks his lips and takes Heather from my arms.
"Just take me home Xan" I sigh grateful to be out of the hospital.

"Home" he nods.

I haven't asked where home is, I haven't pushed on my one condition, I take it back because Alexander Stark in love is something else entirely. So attentive and handsy, so affectionate and considerate. I know it's been hard for him to leave at night, to go back to a empty house without us and be at work.
Three hours a day is not enough time with this man.

"What do you feel like for dinner? You must be ready to kill for a home cooked meal?" I ask Alexander as he drives as a snails pace.
"Something with avocado I think, nachos? Mexican Beer?" He smirks.
"Asshole" I roll my eyes.
"What? I'd tell you all about it" he laughs.

Alexander laughs, who knew?

"I love you" I whisper watching the way his eyes crinkle with his smile.
"God I love that, say it again"
"I love you Xander, I love how happy you are" I whisper.

Alexander looks back through the rear view mirror in my SUV, he checks on his daughter with a smile.

"How happy you've made me, baby.... finally I have everything I've ever wanted, I didn't even know this is what I needed till I met you. I'm just so very grateful for this extra chance you've given me. I promise you Ron, this time I'm not fucking it up" Alexander tells me seriously.
"I hope so, I'm not sure my heart could loose you now" I mumble but I don't think he needs to know this isn't his last chance, I don't think he has a last chance.
"I understand you must have that fear of waking up without me but I want you to know how much I'm really looking forward to waking up beside you tomorrow, tomorrow and everyday of my life" he nods like he's ashamed of himself.
"That's a relief, our daughter will gift you that opportunity at least four times throughout the night. It seems my bad sleeping patterns while pregnant has rubbed of on her" I smile.
"No matter, I'm just glad to have my family home with me"

Alexander doesn't look bothered by the thought of dirty diapers and night feeds, he takes one hand from the wheel and rubs my thigh over my long skirt, the one that served as a bed sheet the first day we met.

Silently I smile as we take the turns that give it away, the turns that take us away from my apartment. Home with me now makes sense.
The thought of my own bed and a antique bassinet was a kind of heaven inside my head but I'm excited, I've never stayed with Alexander, I've never slept in his bed.

He may have a house with a yard and a lawn but the street is busy, lots of cars parked tightly on each side of the road, guess suburban living so close to the city is appealing for more than just me.
The yard is neat, the lawns a dying shade of brown with the late night frost but snow is yet to fall and the peonies along the front of the house sit proud and, by some magic, still blooming. Alexander has painted the house since I last saw it and the classic white with charcoal trim looks fresh and modern.