A Change Of Directions (Camren)

Chapter 27: Jauregay

It shouldn't be such a big deal, but it was. Looking at Lauren, I searched for encouragement from her, but she looked fidgety as well.

We both sat in my car, parked in the school parking lot, not sure waiting for what. We were supposed to go into school for our first class, but we remained frozen in our seats.

"This is it." She breathed, and I jerkily nodded.

We would be entering Lima senior high school as a couple this time, and judging from the reactions from Facebook, a lot of curious looks and secretive whispers were going to become our steady companions for the next few weeks. And we weren't ready for that. We didn't want our private life to become hot topic, gossip theme number one.

When Dinah had came out with Normani, she hadn't been able to get one moment of peace with her girlfriend. Creeps kept following them around, asking for juicy details and jocks kept openly leering at them, whistling after them wherever they went. The hype around them only stopped two weeks later, when everybody got used to seeing Dinah giggling into Normani's mouth during lunch.

And I wasn't ready for that shit. I had a feeling that my relationship with Lauren would be a much bigger deal because hello - Lauren Jauregui, still leader of the Celibacy Club, Head Cheerleader, ex-girlfriend of the quarterback, very much the symbol of a pure Christian girl - dating Camila Cabello? The one who was the female version of Shawn? The one who didn't do dating?

It was a lot to process, even for myself. I still couldn't believe my luck of having the privilege to date Lauren. Because let's face it, she was absolutely gorgeous and she could have anyone she wanted, but she chose me. Me, could you believe that? Me, a big fuck up with a big mouth and a big ego. I was too proud to let my self-consciousness hang out and say that I didn't deserve someone like her, but this nagging feeling of insecurity would always be there.

Because, I mean, what was I compared to her? I was just a gay chick trying to find my place on earth, disoriented and directionless, pretty much without any clue of what I wanted in life. I wasn't special in any way, wasn't academicly smart, didn't have a fascinating personality, hadn't ever achieved big accomplishments which would be considered impressing. Having slept with half of the girls' volleyball team back at my old school was hardly an achievement that would make a talent scout raise an affected eyebrow.

And then there was Lauren - I couldn't even breathe. Not only stunningly gorgeous - almost scaringly perfect at this point - but so multi-faceted in personality. You couldn't describe her character with a few words, with simple adjectives, you just couldn't describe Lauren with words at all. It would be an insult to her and everything she stood for.

Of course I had to fall in love with a girl with the ability to reduce me into a sap with inferiority complexes. I had been asking for it, really, with all the exaggerated shows of being such a badass, it was just a matter of time 'till someone threw their lasso around my pride and had me tamed.

"Camila?"

I startled in my seat and whipped my head around, staring at Lauren. She gave me a small smile and my heart skipped a beat at this.

"I love you."

A big, silly grin that stretched from ear to ear appeared on my face and I leaned towards her, planting a full kiss on her smiling lips before I whispered against them, "I love you, too."

"We can do this." Lauren lowly said, slightly leaning back, but I followed her and captured her bottom lip between mine. This was much better than going to school, I hoped I could convince Lauren to see it that way as well with a few more persuasive kisses.

"Mhm, Camz, we need to -" Lauren didn't get to finish her sentence as I lightly bit on her bottom lip before I soothingly licked it, softly sucking on it. She throatily moaned and buried one hand in my hair, pulling my head closer to hers.