WARNING THIS MAY BE TRIGGERING FOR ANYONE WHO SELF HARMS!
Phee's P.O.V
"You don't have to start being fucking bitchy to me!" I yell down the phone.
"I'm not being bitchy I'm just telling you how it fucking is!" Mel screams back, I can hear she's crying.
"Mel.. don't cry. Just explain to me what you're trying to say please." I try to calm myself down.
"Well after everything you decide to ditch me! I thought you were my best friend! I guess I'm wrong."
Her voice lowers at her last sentence.
"I haven't really ditched you have I?! it's not my fault I'm here in Belfast and we can't sort this properly. Mel you are my best friend! what the fuck is wrong with you?!"
"Phee!! You know all too well what is wrong! You made me feel so shit and now I can't even look at twitter in case one of the MADones has said something!!" She cries.
"Mel.. just listen to me."
And with that she cut off the call.
I sat at the end of Mikes garden in pure shock. I didn't know what to do, I knew Mel hadn't been feeling herself recently but I didn't expect this. I had no clue what was happening but I realised I needed to sort this out.
I sat gazing ahead of me trying to work out what was best when Mike came up to me. He sat himself on the bench with me and wrapped his arm around my shoulders.
"Hey baby what's wrong?" He whispered.
"Mel... We've had a big argument." I turned to look at his face.
"About what?" He looked concerned.
"Tweets... She basically got really jealous because of some other friends I have and turned bitchy."
"Are you angry at her?" He asked as gently traced patterns on the back if my shoulder with his fingertip.
"I was.. but not anymore, I just hope she's alright and that Ben's there to take care of her."
As I looked at Mike he pulled his phone out his pocket, I rolled my eyes. He wasn't even bothered! He could have shown me a bit more sympathy!
"How about this?" He passed me the phone.
I looked at it to see he had typed out a text to Ben. I read it;
'Alright mate? Just wondered if you could check up on Mel, she's had an argument with Phee and we're both worried about her! Hope you're both doing alright and text me when she's calm please. Thanks'
I nodded and pressed the send button, passing the phone back to Mike.
I rested my head on his shoulder as he kissed my forehead.
"I'm actually really worried. We all know how she gets after an argument..." He whispered, barely audible.
"I know babe, so am I." I close my eyes and cuddle up to him more.
We sit there like this for a while, waiting for a response from Mel or Ben.
Mel's P.O.V
I cancel the call and throw my phone at the wall. I didn't want to hear her say it, I knew I wasn't good enough.
I sat on my bed and sobbed, curled in a ball in the covers. I didn't want to lose my bestfriend... But I guessed I already had.
A sudden urge to cut rushed through me, I knew Ben was downstairs so I couldn't do it here. I ran into the bathroom and locked the door.
I grabbed the blade out the locked cupboard as my eyes blurred. I saw the red trickle down my arm from my wrist to my elbow. I cut till I couldn't anymore. I felt weak and I kept drifting in and out of consciousness.
Ben knocked on the door lightly.
"Hey you alright princess?" he called through.
"Yeah, yeah I'm fine."
I built up the strength to stand, I cleaned the blade and put it away. I then washed all the surfaces and cleaned my arm, the water making the cuts sting.
I pulled down my sleeve, cleaned my face from makeup and adjusted my hair in the mirror. I looked presentable, Ben wouldn't realise a thing.
Ben's P.O.V
As soon as Mel walked out the bathroom I knew she was hiding something. I guessed she had been sick or something, she really hadn't been feeling well today.
She walked straight past me and into her bedroom, falling straight on her bed. As I climbed into the bed next to her, I noticed I had a message on my phone. I reached up to the bed side table and pulled my phone off, reading the message from Mike.
I kept reading it over and over... How was I so unaware?! I looked over at Mel in front of me to notice she was asleep. I know she had been crying in the bathroom, but this time she seemed to hide it quite well.
That's when I saw her arm, it was sprawled out in front of her and there was blood seeping through her white long sleeved top.
I pulled her sleeve up and looked at her cuts. It broke my heart when I saw the words engraved in her skin. 'Useless, Ugly, Unwanted, Broken, Fat, Bitch' Etc.
How could she think this of herself?! I reached down to her arm and kissed every cut, every letter and every word till I reached her elbow. As I looked back at her face,she was already staring at me. She looked shocked and taken aback at what I had just done.
"I'm sorry." She whispered, tears brimming her eyes.
"You're none of that." I looked at her sternly.
"Ask your fans and best friends, they think I am." She looked away.
I pulled her close to me and wrapped my arms around her tightly. I kissed the top of her head as we stayed in silence.
"None of them think that... and if they do they're wrong." I broke the silence.
"Ben I don't want to lose Phee. I don't want to lose any of you. You all mean so much to me and I know I never say it enough."
You're not going to lose her, she's worried about you. You should text her and baby I know you care."
I move away and look at her face, her lips crash into mine. I feel her smile slightly into the kiss.
Things will work out even if she thinks they're falling apart.
