This is from a comedy skit by Jeff Dunham.
I hate car rides. The traffic: sucks like HELL. 90 degree heat: Sucks like HELL. Other drivers: angry as HELL. Me: as scared as HELL. Then we turned on the traffic channel. That didn't do a damn thing. I think traffic channels are waste of money and time. They should have ME do the traffic channel I could save time! Lemme show you:
Operator: Hey! It's early and the morning and there's a lot of traffic out there! What's going on?
Me: IT'S 8:00 IN THE MORNING! EVERYONE LEFT THE HOUSE AT THE SAME DAMN TIME! AT 5:00 I'M GONNA TELL YOU THE SAME THING! ONLY GUESS WHAT? THEIR GOING THE OTHER FREAKING WAY!