"Hey, I just wanted to say I miss you..." I typed into my phone. I was lying in my bed, my iPhone clutched tightly in my hands as I felt it hard to breathe and my chest tightening. There was a lump in my throat that I just couldn't get rid of. Today it was one month that Louis and I had been apart. I bit my lip kicking my own ass internally. 'That sounds pathetic!' I thought to myself and deleted the words with clumsy harsh movements of my fingers since they were shaking. "Hey, how are you? How is the tour?" I typed in and looked at the words. 'Still pathetic.' My mind said and I deleted the message again. 'You should just give up and move on, he doesn't want you anymore.' I threw my phone in the corner of my room and dropped my head into the pillow. This breakup was the hardest thing I've ever gone through. It was hard seeing him in the news all the time smiling his ass off in interviews and posing for Fotos while flirting with beautiful fans. As if that hasn't been hard enough some fans also gave me a hard time sending me hate. They told me that it had been about time Louis realized how ugly I am and broke up with me. They said that I wasn't good enough for him anyway and that I should just kill myself. These comments were really nasty and I had over a hundred of them each day in my Twitter, instagram or Facebook mentions each day. It was hard to oversee them and even as I went private I still got many of them trying to block the users that were sending me hate.
It was about two in the morning when I decided rolling myself in the sheets wouldn't help me anything to get to sleep and gave up on trying. I walked into my kitchen to get some Nutella and a spoon, then plopped down on my couch in the living room. I took the remote and turned on the TV flipping through the channels just to see that nothing was on. I flicked through the channels and again like all the time I've come over some music channel where of course some interview with One Direction was aired. I sighed and put my face into a cushion. This was frustrating because while Louis isn't even thinking about me anymore I'm reminded of him everywhere I look and go. Even if I wanted to forget him and move on, which I do, I couldn't because I just can't escape him. I don't even listen to what they guys are talking about I try to block his voice out and somehow after some time I finally fall asleep. Next day I decided to be unplugged for a day so I just text my best friend where I wanna go out tonight and then turn my phone off. I don't care if she comes or not I needed to get out and over this. It couldn't go on like this, me being curled up in my bed while he was so happy without me. So I just listened to music and watched old music the whole day while doing my nails and face masks. This day was about me instead of him.
It was about 9.30 when I arrived at the club I picked. My body was more or less covered in a short black dress that lay tightly. My legs were stuck into 6 inch heels that made my legs seem really long and the dress look even shorter. Besides showing off my legs the dress also showed off a lot of cleavage. All in all I looked really hot tonight, a style I hadn't worn in a while. It was about time I dressed up and gone out again. I also had put on make-up which was making my eyes look bigger and accentuated my full lips. After 15 minutes of waiting I went into the club and decided to enjoy the evening alone, as (y/bf/n) didn't seem to come tonight. I quickly found myself some company as guys came over to buy me drinks and talk to me very much and I was already getting over tipsy with the amount of alcohol I had in my system. I smiled as my head became a peaceful place and the constant hurt I was feeling numbed. The music took over my system and I let it. I didn't care about anything, my thoughts were far away from all the things that were weighing me down. So I just happily moved my body to the music, feeling freed from all the last weeks.
After some times some guy came over to dance with me and I let him. I didn't care. I was free and I felt it all flow through my veins. I was feeling as my body was detoxifying from Louis and I was becoming my previous self again. I swung my hips as his big hands found their way around my body onto my stomach and hips and he rocked himself into my body. I shot him a smile back and he showed me a toothy grin. I already knew who he was he had watched me before and I had already checked him out since he was fucking hot. His hair was dark and in a quiff while his skin had an olive complexion. The skin of his arms that I could see since he had a tank top on was covered in tattoos and his biceps was well trained. All in all he looked for and muscular. I felt his lips connect with my neck and I caught my breathe as he caressed my skin. After some time of grinding into each other and his lips peppering kisses on my neck he turned me around and we sunk into a deep kiss. We had been kissing and grinding for a while when his lips left mine. I was already really bothered by this and he looked just as hungry as me. "You wanna get out of here?" He asked and I nodded.
