Hurt (Kellic) ON HOLD

Desperation

I want to help, but you don't let me in

(Vic's POV)

"What the fuck happened to him?" Mike asks me again when we are walking to school the next day.

"I really don't know."

"Well what do you think happened, no one gets hurt like that by falling." He says and I sigh knowing he's right. "Someone is hurting him and badly, Vic."

"I know, I just don't know how to help him." I say, dragging my feet slightly as we walk.

"Well, I'll help you figure something out if you need." Mike says, squeezing my shoulder reassuringly before beginning to walk to his locker.

"Thank you." I call after him, when he hears it he turns around and gives me a nod of acknowledgement.

I continue walking into the school until I get to my locker. As I put all my things in my locker I can't get my mind off Kellin.

Would he be at school? Is he okay? Is he hurt more than he was yesterday? Is he alive?

I shake off these thoughts and realize the only way to figure out how he is would be to find him. I begin walking towards Kellin's lockers, letting out a sigh of relief when I see him there.

Kellin had his back to me and was talking to who I remember he said was his boyfriend. I continue walking over to where they are.

"Hi Kellin!" I say when I approach them.

They both turn to face me at my voice. Kellin's boyfriend's face seems to harden which makes me frown. I look at Kellin's face and am surprised how different it seems from yesterday. You cannot even see the bruises which littered his face unless you look for them, and he was standing as if he was in no pain. His face paled when he saw me and he seemed to shrink into himself.

"Hi Vic," he says meekly before turning to his boyfriend. "This is Vic, Daniel."

"Nice to meet him," his boyfriend said with no emotion. "I'll see you later."

"Bye." Kellin says, looking very shaken, which I assume is because of what happened yesterday made him jumpy.

Kellin's boyfriend leaves and leaves us in silence. I don't know what to say to him, or if there is anything I could say. I start to think, if he can hide bruises this well, how many times could have something like last night happened?

"You look different." I blurt out, not even thinking about the words.

"What do you mean by that?" He says, obviously confused.

"You know, your face isn't so bruised." I say quietly, not wanting other people to over-hear.

His face scrunched a bit in worry, but he quickly recovered.

"Thanks?"

I don't tell him it wasn't a compliment but smile and ask if he wants to walk to class. When he says yes we start walking and I try to see any trace of the injured boy from yesterday.

If his leg still hurt he hid it well, I couldn't see any limp in his walk at all. The only thing that could tip you off was how his hands were tense and he seemed to be squeezing his hands in a way to combat pain.

He caught me looking as we entered the classroom but said nothing. A sense of nerves seemed to break over him but I didn't know what to say.

We sat down in our seats in an awkward silence. I looked over one more time, still not believing this was the boy who I found limping home covered in bruises and blood.

"Can you not look at me like that?" Kellin whispers, breaking me from my thoughts.

The look on his face is full of emotion, making me look down embarrassed.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry it's my fault, I brought you into my problems." Kellin says and my heart breaks.

"It's not your fault." I said before turning back to the front to listen to the teacher.

Then so quietly that I might have imagined him saying it, I heard him quietly mumble,

"It's always my fault."

"Who told you that?" I ask, frowning at his words.

"No one," he says, pausing. "It's just true."

"Kelly, Vic, stop talking please." The teacher calls, interrupting me from saying anything in response to Kellin.

I look over at him to check if he's okay. He looks just the same, but the air around him seemed heavier, and I could just see how tired he was.

——————-

Kellin wasn't much better at lunch, he seemed to let more and more of what he was really feeling out every minute.

"Are you okay?" I ask, knowing the answer, but not being able to help unless he lets me.

"I'm good." He says, but the way he's been acting and how I noticed he has been running his hands over his upper chest self-consciously every once in a while, he doesn't seem fine at all.

"Is your chest in pain?" I whisper, gesturing towards right below my collar bones.

"Why would you say that?"

"Because you keep running your hands over the front of your chest." I explain, causing him to blush in embarrassment.

"No," he starts, not looking at me. "It's just she called me Kelly, which is what the attendance says but I thought I passed pretty well, apparently not."

"Passed?" I ask, confused. "We didn't take any tests?"

He laughs slightly, one of the only times I've seen him do so.

"No, like passed as a dude."

"Oh." I say, feeling a bit embarrassed for not understanding. "You don't need to worry, you pass very well."

"Thanks Vic." He says smiling, making me let go the idea of bringing up what happened yesterday. If he's smiling, it's probably best to just leave him as happy as possible.

I wish I could see him smiling all the time.