mi amor | jungkook AU

xxxiii

what do you do when you wake up and everything feels off? the world doesn't feel real. i don't feel real. for all i know, everything is a figment of someone else's imagination.

i walk out of my room with a new... vibe? the hallway feels dizzier and the air feels denser. maybe i'm still partially drunk.

and the thing is, i pass jungkook. i can feel his stare on me as i make coffee. i look at him, "what?" it comes out as a whisper, and when he doesn't respond i leave with a, "okay... good morning?" and sip my coffee.

i take a seat on the table next to yoongi, and he stares at me longer than usual. "morning, suga." i say lowly so only he hears me. "i'm sorry you had to deal with me drunk... again." i say.

he looks shocked and surprised. "you don't remember anything?" he asks me. i try to think of last night. "i remember us sitting down somewhere? annnd... you taking me home?" i recall.

there's something more intriguing about him today that i can not recall. i look down to his lips. "did you go on a date after you took me home?" i ask him.

he coughs his drink up, "wha- why you ask?" i shrug, "something feels off about you. what are you hiding from me?"

the rest of the guys say nothing and he doesn't comment. "what?" i ask everyone. namjoon tries to talk, but nothing comes out. taehyung and jimin look at each other. the rest of the guys are either looking at their food or anywhere else but me.

jungkook comes out of the kitchen, stares at me and scoffs, then leaves. i frown, "what's up with him?" my mood had instantly turned sour.

"you kissed yoongi last night." hobi says. that catches my attention, immediately. "wha-" i try to form a question but my mind blanks out.

"yoongi?" i look at him. he swallows hard on his sandwich. "you called me jungkook before you did." he says. "i... i'm sorry..." i say.

i can't believe i did that.

"do... do you want to talk later?" i ask him. he nods and excuses himself from the table. we watch him leave. everyone leaves at their own, but fast, pace.

it is now hobi and i at the table.

"things sure seem to be out of place." he jokes. i nod, "yeah...."

more awkward silence.

"um... it'll be okay, amor." he tries to cheer me up. i sigh, "i... i hope so."

he gets up, "let's go to the balcony." at first i'm taken by surprise by his comment, however i am soon following him to the balcony.

"i thought you'd like to talk to someone while enjoying the outside breeze." he smiles, which puts a smile on my face.

it takes a moment for me to collect my thoughts and form them into the right words, "i didn't know i kissed yoongi last night. i don't know why i did." hoseok nods. "you called him jungkook last night too." he comments.

i didn't want to feel it, but there was a pang in my heart. "i don't want to admit it to anyone else, not even myself, but i'll let this thought out to the void." i tell him, "i was hurt that kookie was going to let go so easily... we weren't even dating. he was just someone i knew from a mutual and i got to know him and..."

"you ended up falling in love with him." he finishes my thought. i chuckle softly and nod, "i did."

"i know you did."

the soft breezes filled in the silence between us. he gets on his phone.

"you know, you should probably talk to yoongi soon." he tells me. "i should." i agree, realizing how much time has passed by us. when i enter the living room, i'm greeted with jungkook getting ready to go to the balcony.

it was a cliche moment; we both stopped and stared at each other.

i felt my face go hot. "uh," i don't know what to say, "hi..."

he looks the other direction and bites his lip. i didn't realize the breath i was holding until he repeated what i said, "uh, hi..."

the balcony door opens.

"are you just gonna stand there or are you going to come out here, kook?" hoseok peeks his head out, a smile on his face.

"right." jungkook and i tango in each others way until were on the sides we needed to be on.

"amor." hoseok said, looking towards the hallway. i nod my head and make a beeline for yoongi's room, knocked on his door, then walked in.

"not going to wait for a call in?" he comments as i stand in front of his doorway. "i didn't want to stand outside and wait a century for your call." i tell him.

he hums back in response. "we should talk about last night." i tell him. he nods, "i know we do."

"tell me what you're thinking right now, please." i beg him. he sighs and looks at me for a moment.

"there was so much you said last night." he tells me, but doesn't say anything more.

i take a seat next to him on his bed. i'm not sure if i want to know what i said, but i ask anyways.

a sad chuckle comes from his lips and a soft sigh, "you wanted us to date, i think. you said it wasn't fair... you wanted to make the first move. there... what were you thinking, amor?"

i'm more than hurt at what he tells me, but he's right. what was i thinking?

we don't talk. i don't talk. yoongi doesn't even bother to face me.

"i'm sorry." i tell him.

"are you?"

i don't know what to do.

"i am."

"sure you are, amor. you said a lot of shit last night that really... it meant something to me." his voice began rising. "i've known since we were kids... kids... i've loved you since... i don't know when, but you fall in love with jungkook? after, what? a few days. that isn't fair."

he lays down on the bed. "i'm so sorry, yoongi," i tell him, "and i know it isn't fair... i'm sorry."

his voice is harsh, "i don't want your apologies.

tears start to blur my vision. i yell at him, "well, i don't know what the fuck you want from me yoongi!"

"i want you to see how fucking hurt i am!"

"i can see that clearly! you don't have to be so fucking harsh! i see my mistake. i don't know what more i can do to... i loved you so fucking much, okay? i'm sorry shit didn't turn out the way your fantasy wanted to."

yoongi comes closer to me, and wipes the tears from my eyes.

"stop crying." is all he says.

i laugh, "shut up."

and now we're just staring at each others eyes...

and i'm looking at his lips...

and our faces come closer to each other.

and...

once again, we're kissing...