Identity [FINISHED]

(19) Swimming Decisions (1)

Owen Maraj

I woke up and noticed that Beyoncé wasn't laying beside me. It made me scratch my head before getting out of bed. Opening the door, I went out and went to the living room. I saw Beyoncé and Solange talking and eating.

"Hey Owen, are you hungry?" Beyoncé asked me. I nod as she takes out a burrito and hands it to me. I sit beside her and Solange before eating my burrito.

"So Owen... you want to go swim today?"

Oh fuck.

"Swimming?" I asked. I haven't been swimming in YEARS. You could probably guess why but I don't even have anything to properly swim in.

"That's what I said... so you better get something to swim in."

"Uh... I don't know. Maybe you and Beyoncé can just go. I don't like being in public anyway."

"We're going to a private pool,"'she says. What the fuck? I've never heard of a private pool. I turned to Beyoncé and she gave me this apologetic look. I grunt before eating more of the burrito I was given.

"Fine."

1 hour later....

I was sitting on the bed waiting for Beyoncé yo get ready but she was taking a long time. I was still trying to figure out what to wear to this private pool. I was going to decide on picking a basketball shirt and some shorts but then I wouldn't feel too comfortable. I had started to get frustrated and it was making me somewhat sad that I had to go through this.

"Owen, what's wrong? Why do you look so sad?" Beyonce asked me. I eyed her, not even noticing she had sat on my lap. I looked down as she kissed my forehead. "Are you afraid?" I couldn't lie. I was afraid... of them lying and saying it was a private pool but people were still there. I didn't want to be looked at as a freak again... or called out for someone noticing I have a penis... when I noticeably look like a woman.

The last time I went to the pool... I was 10. My father and I had obviously gone together and he had me in a tight bathing suit to try to hide the fact I was a hermaphrodite... but it only just got worse as I complained. I told him it was too tight and I had refused to swim... but he didn't listen. He ended up staying at the pool all day just to torture me.

When I got home, my mother looked at my skin which was red. The pain was unbearable... I later was in the hospital because my penis wouldn't stop hurting. They said it was going to be fine but I just had to rest... and I was happy... but my father wasn't. There was so much I wanted to say and do and tell him to stop but it just wouldn't work.

And now...

I was going to the pool again... scared someone may notice me, scared I might be too scared to have fun. I know they would never try to hurt me but... I would've never thought my father would too.

"OWEN!" I snapped out of my thinking and looked at Beyoncé who was now snapping in my face.

"I don't think I want to go."

"Why baby? What's wrong?"

"If I tell you, you won't want to go to the pool with Solange," I said.

"Tell me, you're more important than a pool."

"Okay," I said shifting my position. "As you know, my father was verbally abusive and physically abusive towards me. I am struggling with it still and I fear that he might come back one day and hurt me. One day I went to the pool with him. He was smiling and talking with everyone like it was fine... but I wasn't. I was wearing a noticeably tight bathing suit to cover up the fact I had a penis. It had hurt so bad, that when I got home I had eventually went to the hospital and they told me to just rest... but even after that I could still feel the pain even when it wasn't there anymore. He's done so many things to me that I avoid doing them because I'm afraid of people saying something and trying to hurt me." I noticed tears were streaming down my face. I wiped them before looking at Beyoncé.

"Owen, we don't have to go anymore... I understand if you're not ready to."

"I don't want to make y'all not go because of me. I just felt some type of way and knew I had to tell you."

"Owen," she said cupping my face in her hands. "We don't have to go today."

"Okay... but what are you guys gonna do then?"

"We can hang out here all day, Solange isn't going anywhere."

"Sounds cool..." I said putting my head down again. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything. I saw Beyoncé taking her bathing suit off and I looked away. I didn't want to be this way... but I knew if I talked with them... it would help me.

"Owen? Do you want to go get food with me? We could do a movie night tonight?"

"Sure." I got up and put on some slides before putting my hair up in a bun.

"I need to decide if I should wear the blue and green bathing suit?" Solange asked coming in the room.

"We're not going anymore Solange. Owen is uncomfortable... maybe another time okay?"

"Well damn... what we doing then?"

"We're doing movie night," Beyoncé says. Solange frowns before looking at me.

"Alright, Owen. I don't know what happened but I hope you're okay... but we're going to the store."

"I had already planned that," Beyoncé says letting out a laugh. I kept quiet the whole time.

"Alright, I'm just gonna wear this," I said.

___________

Whew, I feels sorry for Owen.

Sorry for mistakes♥️, so much has been happening and it was hard to write but anyways answer this questions... please?🤧

How do you feel about this chapter?

Owen's situation?

Beyoncé's response?

Owen's mood?

Solange?

Their movie night?

Predictions on part 2 of this chapter?

Any questions?

~Daddy