Breaking Free (BXB)

Chapter 11-Eavesdropping

I stared blankly at the walls of the cave, curled under piles of blankets. I had memorized every crack and curve and dip in the rocks, my mind sometimes empty, sometimes whirring in a dark spiral, thoughts of my father alone at home, my mother sick and pretending to love me swirling around among the hateful words Kota had said to me. If she wanted me to join her cause, that was a sure fire way to send me away. I huffed, shifting further beneath my blankets, wishing to be swallowed whole by the heavy blankets.

The fluttering of the curtains alerted me to Owen's presence.  I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to block out his beautiful hazel eyes staring at me sadly, his face somber and pleading, his body limp and miserable. I had done that to him and a part of me reached out, longing to be in his arms. I could hear his voice, heavy and soft as he begged me to get up, his voice cracking. He had been here every day for the last couple of days doing the same thing. Every time I could feel him chiseling a crack within my heart and my resolve. I swallowed thickly. Owen cleared his throat and my eyes fluttered open again and I stared holes into the wall, refusing to look at him. If I looked at him I would shatter, and I much preferred my mountain of blankets and wallowing.

"Milo, will you please look at me?" His voice was exactly like I thought it would be, croaking and desperate and broken. My heart squeezed. I continued to stare at the wall. There was a long pause before the edge of my bed dipped underneath his weight. "You can't stay in here forever, you know. You have to come out at some point." I huffed and turned onto my other side, refusing to look into his eyes. I could stay here for however long I wanted. His hand hovered over my shoulder and I craved his touch, my entire body crying out for him, but still, I pulled away.

"Just leave me alone," I muttered, my voice breaking. Something in the atmosphere shifted and I stiffened. He had always been patient, never pushing past my boundaries. This was new and different and very much impatient. Without warning, Owen ripped off my blankets and I whimpered, curling into a ball, the cold biting my skin angrily.

"Get up." Owen's voice was firm and shaking with anger, but his eyes were melting with unspoken pain. My body ached to comfort him, to fix things between us, but I didn't move. The misery was too deeply rooted. "Milo, get up." He spat out slowly, his voice shaking with barely concealed rage. I felt like a child being scolded, but every bone in my body fought to stay in the bed.

"No." I groaned, burying my head further in my pillow, trying to pretend he wasn't standing there. Cold hands reached under my arms and pulled me to a sitting position swiftly. I glared at Owen, my body limp in his arms. I let my head loll to the side and Owen rolled his eyes.

"I am not leaving till you get up, Milo. This isn't good for you." I narrowed my eyes at him. Who was he to say what was good for me or not?  He may have made a connection with my sleeping body, he certainly had enough time to do that, but that person wasn't me, it was his idea of who I was and nothing more. "You are going to come to lunch with me. You haven't eaten anything in days. Days, Milo." He pressed, he had let go of me and his arms were crossed. I rolled my eyes, standing up and grabbing some clothes from the little compartments under my bed. Strangers had filled them with clothes while I was moping. The clothes were mostly athletic wear, and even if I didn't really have the body to make them look good, they were all I had, so I slipped on the skin-tight black shirt and joggers. They were nothing if not comfy.

Owen stared at me, his eyes as wide as dinner plates and his mouth slack-jawed. He watched as I walked towards him, my face blank. I acted like everything was fine because I had gotten up, even if my heart still ached terribly and my body yearned for the blanket. I would pretend for his sake. And maybe I was a little bit hungry, but he didn't need to know that. Pushing all thoughts of my Mom out of my mind, I prepared myself to leave the room. Turning back, I noticed Owen hadn't moved an inch, still standing in shock.