Breaking Free (BXB)

Chapter 13-The Key

"Milo, calm down, I'm sure everything is fine." I stopped my pacing, whipping my head around to glare at him. Black spots clouded my vision for a second and I gripped my head, turning to glare at Owen.

"How could you say that? My dad was being dragged by your 'raiders'." I cried, throwing my arms up into the air, letting them flop on top of my head in exasperation and exhaustion. The world seemed to be spinning in lazy, confusing circles, tripping me up at every turn.

"Milo, please sit down," Owen begged, reaching forward for me. I slapped away his hands, crossing my arms. After everything that happened and all the time he had, he still had so much to explain, like why he was here, how everything added up in his mind because nothing made sense in mine. "Please," He tried again, his arms remaining by his sides, fingers twitching. "It can't be good for you to be up after what happened. The doctor said to stay on bed rest." 

I stared blankly at him, running my hands through my hair. I didn't remember any of that. I couldn't deny that I felt terrible, my body aching and groaning at every move I made and my head throbbed painfully, but none of that mattered. The look on my dad's face. The gash, his body being dragged like a ragdoll, his eyes, oh god his eyes. Tears pushed for release and I blinked them away. Not now. Now I needed to be strong. Because that's what mattered. Getting my dad and leaving this place.

"No." I snapped. "No," I repeated, softer. This whole conversation felt too intimate. It pressed softly against my heart and made me wonder how I had gotten here. I couldn't tell you much of anything about Owen and I doubt he could tell anyone much about me, either, but somehow he had wormed his way into my heart and we kept getting caught up in situations like this. We were too close to each other to pretend there wasn't something there, but not close enough to mention it. It sucked, and it sucked even more that everything else was going on at the same time. It sucked that I couldn't be a normal teenager and worry about my feelings for him and his for me, and it sucked more than anything that my life had suddenly turned so completely upside down within a handful of days and there wasn't anything I could do about it. There was no going back, no forgetting or pretending. I couldn't leave this world.

"Milo," Owen pleaded softly, I could see him start to reach for me again, but then he stopped and let his hand drop, his face scrunched up and sad. I turned away, my eyes fixed firmly on the wall.

"No," I whispered as firmly as I could manage. Owen gazed at me softly, carefully taking steps towards me. I didn't move, just letting him come to me. I felt something in the pit of my stomach roll over in discomfort, but the moment his arms wrapped around me, I melted. I let him guide me to the bed and tuck me in. There was an awkward tension between us, words that were sitting in the air heavily, waiting to be spoken.

"Do you want me to-" He took in a breath, stress painting itself across his face. It was so painfully beautiful it could be hung in a museum beside the Mona Lisa. "Do you want me to stay." He finished an edge of hope in his voice. Something deep inside me tugged in guilt. I knew what I had to do, but that didn't make it any easier.

"No." I murmured, not meeting his eyes.

"Ok." He whispered his voice tense. Closing my eyes, I slowed my breathing in an attempt to look asleep, listening to his footsteps receding down the hall. Holding my breath I waited for several minutes. I counted to ten before my eyes flew open, determination and maybe a little bit of guilt circulating in my veins and hardening my eyes.

Tossing back the covers, I hopped up, padding softly over to the curtain. Peering through, I checked to make sure no one was there. Somewhere deep inside me, I hoped that Owen would stand there waiting for me so he could wrap me in his arms and keep me from doing something stupid. It was completely empty.