Spark in the Dark

Chapter 60

Shawn got up early the next morning to go for a run before getting ready for Donna's funeral. Juice hadn't spent the night since she had so much to do that morning. When she got back from running, she unlocked her back door and headed for the stairs to go shower, but something out her front window caught her eye and she stopped to get a better look. Tig was there, sitting on her porch swing. She opened the front door and stuck her head out.

"Hey," she said to get his attention. He was lost in his thoughts and hadn't noticed the front door being opened. When he heard her voice, Tig finally snapped out of it.

"Hey. Morning, Shawnie," he replied as he rose from the swing.

"Coming in?" Shawn noticed that his face was cut and bruised, but knew better than to ask what happened.

"Yeah, if you don't mind."

"Not at all. Sorry you had to sit out here. I was out for a run. I do have to shower and head to Opie's before the funeral. I told him I'd help get the kids ready."

"I won't stay too long then," Tig said as they entered the house. "I just wanted to check in with you. I know this must be hard on you."

"I'm," Shawn started, but hesitated as she thought of what to say. "I'm alright, I guess. I wasn't close with Donna, but we were friendly when we saw each other. I feel sorry for Ellie and Kenny, though."

Tig looked upset. Shawn tried to think of the last time she had ever seen her father look like this and couldn't ever remember a time.

"Yeah, two kids with no mom. That must be bringing up some past shit for you," Tig said and pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger.

"Hey, Dad. Are you ok?"

Tig stepped toward her and took her face in his hands. He kissed her forehead and whispered, "I love you, Shawn."

"I love you, too, Dad," Shawn said with uncertainty. She and her father would hug and he sometimes kissed her, but this was obviously different.

"I'll go. Let you get ready. I'll see you there."

"Ok," Shawn said and watched him leave. Once he was on his bike and pulled away, she shut her front door and locked it before going upstairs. She showered quickly and blow dried her hair once she got out. She pulled her hair into a very neat ballerina bun on top of her hair and applied a little bit of makeup. Once she was dressed, she left and headed for Opie's.

This time Opie answered the door instead of his mother. She was glad she had offered to help that morning. It would be time to go soon and Opie wasn't dressed for a funeral at all.

"Hey," he greeted her. "Mary is getting Kenny dressed. I can't get Ellie to come out of her room."

"I'm on it. You just go get yourself ready, alright?"

"Yeah. Thanks."

Shawn walked down the hall to Ellie's room and lightly knocked.

"Ellie? Hey, it's Aunt Shawn. Can I come in?" There was no response, but a moment later, the door opened. Ellie had obviously been crying. "Hey, El. Want some help getting ready?"

Ellie nodded. "I tried to braid my hair. Mommy always liked it in a braid, but I can't do it myself. She did it for me."

"Ok, well here. I'll do it." Ellie let Shawn enter her bedroom and Shawn had the little girl sit on the bed as she braided her hair. "I see why your mom liked it like this. It looks pretty. Maybe one night I could come over and teach you how to braid it? Maybe a couple other hair styles you might like, too?"

"Ok," Ellie said quietly.

"Did you know my mom died when I was little, too?"

"She did?"

"Yea. I don't remember her I was so young, but if you ever wanted to talk to someone you could talk to me. I'd understand. Just have your dad or grandpa give me a call, ok?"

"Yea. Ok."

"So, what do you want to wear?"

Shawn helped Ellie pick out an outfit, then Shawn stepped out of the room so she could get dressed in private. When she came out, Ellie went with Mary and Kenny to Opie's room. Shawn hung back. She didn't want to empose on a private family moment.

They all left Opie's shortly after. Mary and the kids were to ride in a limo behind the members of SAMCRO and with members of other charters behind them. Opie offered to have Shawn and Gemma ride in the limo with them. Gemma agreed, but Shawn hesitated.

"Ride with us. Please?" Ellie asked, making Shawn agree.

Once everyone arrived for the funeral, Gemma, Mary, and the kids sat in one spot with Opie, while Shawn had to sit down further. Tara arrived and took the seat next to her. The club members all stood behind them and Shawn noticed Juice as he took a spot close to her. They made eye contact and Juice gave her a silent nod. Shawn returned with a sad smile. She noticed he still had Jax's cut in his hands. The funeral began and Shawn turned back around to pay attention.

The priest talked about Donna's character. How she was a devoted wife and mother who always wanted what was best for her family. Shawn tried to pay attention to what he said, but ended up using all her focus to not cry. Everyone stood at one point and Shawn wasn't sure why until she saw that the priest was instructing people to lay a flower on top of Donna's casket. Shawn followed everyone else's lead and sat back down.

The funeral was coming to a close when Shawn noticed Jax approaching them. Tara must have seen him at the same time. She stood and took Jax's cut from Juice and walked over to put it on his back. Then she kissed him, making Shawn roll her eyes. Jax walked over to place a flower on Donna's casket like everyone else had. He gave a pointed stare to a some of the other members before walking away. Shawn didn't understand his behavior and watched him walk away in confusion. When she pulled her attention away from him, she saw Tara was also watching Jax with a grin on her face. Tara eventually sat back down next to Shawn and Shawn gave her a dirty look.

"What?" Tara asked quietly.

"Oh, nothing. That's totally appropriate behavior at someone's funeral," Shawn answered her sarcastically. Tara scoffed, but otherwise ignored Shawn.

The funeral ended and everyone began to leave. Juice approached Shawn after Tara walked away.

"You ok?" He asked.

"Yea, fine."

"I'd hug you or something, but..."

"I know. I get it. I don't think anyone is paying attention to us today, but why risk it?"

Juice looked around. She was right. No one was paying attention to them. "I know we were supposed to tell Tig yesterday. Do you still want to?"

"What? Tell him?" Juice nodded. "Yea, of course. I don't think now is a good time."

"No, not now," Juice agreed. Then he lowered his voice even more. "Come over later. We can talk about it then?"

"Ok," Shawn told him. She saw Mary was getting the kids back into the limo. "I should go. I'm sure Mary wants to get the kids home and they're my ride."

Juice nodded and Shawn walked over to the limo and got in. Once she was settled, Ellie switched her seat to be next to Shawn. Kenny then followed his sister's lead and sat on Shawn's other side. Shawn wrapped an arm around each kid as they rode back to the funeral home.