Family is not only blood

The fight

Ezra's p.o.v

I huffed as I almost dropped my lightsaber. Kanan had the marvelous idea to do some lightsaber training. I'm usually really exited to use my lightsaber but I was just not in mood today. Also, the new lightsaber moves Kanan was trying to teach me were too difficult.

I groaned as I lost my balance and fell on the ground.

"Get up. You'll have to do it again"

I didn't got up. I just wanted to get out of here. I am always doing my best in every lesson. Why can't Kanan just let me go for one time?

"Ezra?" Kanan raised an eyebrow at me.

"I don't want to" I said trying to hold back my anger. I don't even know why I was so angry today. Or why I was becoming so angry at Kanan. I guess I just had a bad day and Kanan wasn't helping.

"Ezra, you need to learn these moves"
Kanan said in a serious and strict tone. I hate it when he has that tone. It usually makes me behave but today it just increased my anger.

"I said no!" I answered raising my voice a little.

"Ezra!" Kanan said his voice becomes more threatening, like he was warning me. He wasn't yelling but I knew that I was getting on his nerves.

"Why should I listen to you?" I said getting more frustrated every moment.

"Because I'm your master!" Kanan shouted and shoved my shoulder a little bit. That got me.

"No! You're not! You never finished your training! Because you were too coward to save your master!" I shouted loosing my temperature.

Kanan gasped and took some steps back.

After I took some deep breaths, I realized what I just said. The anger quickly disappeared and I felt guilt welling up my whole body.

I looked up at Kanan who was looking down.

"Kanan I-"

"Lesson's over" he said as he walked away.

I took a sharp breath. My mind couldn't process what just happened. Why do I have to be so stupid?

I walked upstairs and straight to my room. The last thing I needed now is the crew making questions. Kanan probably told them everything that happened in training. They must be so angry at me.

But, I guess I'll have to deal with their and Kanan's didisappointment at dinner. I sighed as I closed my eyes and took some deep breaths. I dived into the force trying to sense Kanan's force signature. I found him on his room. As I dived more into the force I tried to feel his feelings. As I focused at his presence more I realized that.......he was blocking me?

Kanan had never done that before. He usually let's me in or if he doesn't want to he sends me a feeling of annoyance through the force. But now, it was not the same. His shields were up blocking me out of his mind.

I quickly stopped my connection with the force and opened my eyes. I have never seen Kanan like that. The sense of guilty and shame grew more if possible. I tried to ignore how terrible I felt and focus on something else.

I closed my eyes and dived into the force once more. This time I focused on the calm and peaceful force signature of the animals hiding in the fields outside the ship. Most of them were lothcats but some birds flying by were included. Everything was so calm and peaceful. Everything was in balance. Before I realized, I was out like a light.

The next day

Still Ezra's p.o.v

"Hey kid!"