BAD REPUTATION.

03

Brandy Mae.

To be honest, five years ago, if someone had asked me what I saw myself doing for my twentieth birthday, I would have probably come up with a long list of amazing things like ; having a mind blowing threesome with Johnny Depp and Madonna, or maybe a threesome with that tall guy from friends and that bald guy from transporter-Are these people still famous? I would even say I was destined to be the next Tyra Banks since I'd already perfected the art of strutting my stuff along my secondary school hallways. I also knew how to make a good sultry gaze

Never ever and I mean absolutely never ever, did I ever think that I'd spent the day in a slightly empty bar called Dirty bastard, selling alcohol to boring middle aged men and praying that one of them would decide to YOLO his salary at the bar so I could finally pay my one of my too many bills.

Wishes are for horses.

Since today is a day I'm going to call 'Brandy Mae's day of being honest',I'm honestly going to say that four years ago, I was without a doubt very stupid.

Not just stupid . Stupid, reckless, wild and already out of fucks to give. You don't strut like I used to strut and still have any fucks to give.

Just like that song about chandeliers, I was the girl 'for a good time call'. The girl who all the boys called if they wanted a good time - all the people who can give a good sultry gaze can give a good time. Just look at Ian Somerhalder. That's one motherfucker with a very unforgettable, very seductive gaze.

This is how I came to know of him. Ian somerhalder I mean. Way back five years ago, for two solid hours, I got the chance to gaze at his sultry gaze. It happened while I was chilling in the bedroom of a guy who was too ashamed to be seen with me at the underage party that was happening downstairs. Feeling bored, I'd turned on the TV in the guy's room and found that he'd been watching something which he'd left on pause. I'd unpaused and lo and behold, my dream guy was right there on the screen. I was hypnotized by that smirk. Even when Mr guy finally showed up and started kissing and feeling me up,my eyes were still on the screen. I was a bit disappointed when mr guy wanted us to do it missionary style because I couldn't see the TV, but I found a way to get around that. I introduced him to reverse cowgirl. As he moaned and fondled, I grinded and watched a scene where mr smirk was fighting(aggressively flirting) with the Elena doppelganger. Coincidentally, at the exact moment he pinned her down on the bed was the exact moment the guy under me moaned in a way that meant he was coming. Mr smirk(who I'd finally learned his name was Ian Somerhalder) and I smirked.

Anyway, now I hate guys with smirks and sultry gazes. Except Ian Somerhalder's.
Every now and then I drench that memory of Ian and I smirking just to remind myself of a time I felt like I was the shit.

I truthfully or is it honestly? would like to say that my stupidity was not all me. It was inherited. Together with my shiny black hair, stupidity was something I inherited from my mother. My mother has done a lot of stupid things.

Today is my twentieth birthday or as I'm calling it 'Brandy Mae's day of being honest' and I feel in the mood for compiling a list of stupid things done by my mother. It will be my birthday gift to myself and also it will distract me from all these non existent customers.

Stupid things done by my mother.

1) Naming her only daughter- her only child- Brandy Mae. My first name has zero relation to the long distance singer but ninety eight percent relation to alcohol. Any African name would have been preferable but my mom claims she belongs in the 'woke generation' where she's not bound by African traditional laws of child naming. Literally everybody knows that you give a new born child a good Christian name, followed by an even nicer African name with a good meaning that is supposed to mirror the characters you want your child to grow up with!
The surname is not that important.
I've always liked the name Taji- it means crown in Swahili.
Maybe I would have made different choices in life if I had been named Taji.