Snapshot // Sodapop and Dallas

Chapter 20

"You knew the whole time," Ponyboy mumbled. "You knew you were our brother and you knew we had a sister and you didn't tell us?" He was angry. Dallas glanced down at the floor.

"It was messy Ponyboy. I talked to mom when I moved back here and we both decided it would be better to not tell you until we were all friends. And then-"

"She died." Ponyboy finished. He had a foreign look on his face. Ponyboy was such a natural beauty that almost any emotion looked good on him. Not anger. It just made my heart sink to see him angry.

"Ponyboy," Darry spoke up calming him down. He stood up from the couch and approached Dallas.

"Dal, let's take a walk." Dally nodded and the both exited through the front door leaving us to stand in silence. I wanted to talk to Ponyboy. I knew this was hurting him for some reason.

"Are you good?" I asked Sodapop who hadn't said anything.

"Yeah. Just shocked. I can't believe mom never told us." I nodded understanding. I'm sure that must be hard to comprehend. I kissed his cheek and stood up.

"Ponyboy, come with me," I commanded. He didn't respond. Just stared blankly at his hands. "Pony," I said again this time with more pleading in my voice. He finally got up and we walked to his bedroom.

"Talk to me," I insisted.

"I ain't got nothing to say, Henna." His voice was still hard and cold and I didn't know why. I understand Darry's reaction. Wanting to talk to Dallas alone and I definitely understood Soda's confusion. I just didn't know why Ponyboy was angry.

"Please talk to me." I had missed Ponyboy on our little trip. We had grown exceptionally close before Soda and I broke up. He was like my little brother now and I'd do anything for him.

"It ain't fair!" He yelled getting up from the bed. "It ain't fair that he got off easy like that!" I was confused. I had no idea what Ponyboy meant by any of this. I just remained sitting down and let pony vent. "It isn't fair Hendrix! And she didn't even tell us! She didn't even tell us!" His voice was beginning to break and tears started falling. I stood up quickly and grabbed him and hugged him as tightly as I could.

"What's not fair Ponyboy?" I whispered the question that I just couldn't figure out.

He pulled away and looked at me. "He got to love her too, but he didn't have to sit in this House night after night when she wasn't here anymore. The sounds of her cooking breakfast and the smell of her perfume she wore every Friday night when she went out with my dad," he paused to wipe another tear away and then he hugged me again. "He didn't have to lose her like I did."

I held that boy as tightly as I could. I understood now. If I had a long lost brother, I would envy him too. He wouldn't have to hurt every time he heard my dad's favorite song. Or shiver at the smell of pancakes because it reminds him of my mother's cooking. Ponyboy felt like Dally got off easy. And to him, that was so unfair that it hurt.

"Would you change it?" I asked still in a quiet whisper.

"What?"

"Would you change it?" I repeated. "Would you change places with Dallas? And not get to experience all of the wonderful things about your mom." He sniffed and wiped the last tear away. He looked down at his feet in defeat. He knew he wouldn't. Nobody in their right mind would.

"Not in a million years."

"Then maybe Dally is the unlucky one." I suggested. Ponyboy nodded in agreement. "Look Ponyboy, this is a difficult situation to say the least. Just try and get to know your new sister."

"Yeah," he agreed. "You're really great, you know that?"

"So I've heard." I replied in a sarcastically arrogant tone that made him smile. And then we walked back out into the living room to try and get to know more about Austin Winston.