If he were to rise again - A Merthur story [COMPLETED]

preparing to tell a story - Chapter 4

Okay so this chapter is about the story of what happened to all the other characters once Merlin returned to Camelot. Please give me a chance with this one, I have never actually written in third person before. Hope you enjoy xx

**MERLIN 'S POV**

I lay awake, unable to sleep despite hours of trying, the couch was uncomfortable but Arthur needed the bed more. He wants to know, no, deserves to know the story of what happened to him, his friends, his family. The trouble is I haven't let the pain in, in so many decades, if I let it in now, there will be no ridding of it again, but it would be different this time, I would have Arthur there to help me through the pain and he would have me. Even remembering all the people I lost hurts, but to relive it and tell their story will surely kill me.

____ Arthur's Death

Tears still stung at his eyes and the question of 'what will I do now?' rang in his head. Merlin's whole life had been dedicated to saving and protecting Arthur, and if he wasn't doing that he was trying to defeat Morgana and Mordred but surely they were all dead and the great dragon was becoming too old to make the journey to converse with him. The young warlocks life no longer had any meaning, no purpose, he mean't nothing anymore. He allowed another tear to escape his red eyes and cascade down his blotchy face.

There it was. The castle stood strong in the centre of Camelot, waiting for Merlin and its king to return but no king was standing by Merlin's side, no king was there to lead the great kingdom into better times, no king was there to make Merlin smile and laugh or give him a purpose or call him names or jokingly offend him, he was returning alone, only to be the bearer of bad news. Terrible news.

Merlin approached the great entrance to the citadel, he glanced over to the training ground were him and Arthur had first met, 'I could never have a friend that could be such an ass...' he let out a soft chuckle at the memory, then a few more tears fell. He walked through the citadel, 'I'm sorry. How long have you been training to be a prat? ... my lord' another gentle laugh. The memories haunted the space Arthur had not yet managed to take up.
The citadel was empty, no one was there, Merlin stood and forced himself to picture Arthur's small, forced back smile. "I love you, you prat..."the warlock whispered to the ghost of Arthur's memory.
He carried on unable to deal with all the emotion flooding his head. As he reached the large steps to the castle he noticed his old, tired looking guardian waiting for his return, as the frail man spotted Merlin he got up quickly.
"My dear boy."The man enveloped him in a wide hug as Merlin's tears fell at rapid speed from his eyes.
"He's gone Gaius, he's not coming back." He sniffed and walked away from the sorrow-filled old man.
"My dear dear boy."Was all the words he could seem to muster. "The Queen is awaiting you." Gaius said suddenly remembering, Merlin nodded and wiped his cheeks.

His footsteps echoed through the large thrown room but Gwen didn't turn at his entrance.
"Gwen," he cleared his throat,  " he's gone Gwen."He muttered
"I know Merlin. I felt him leave. I felt him go." Her voice was breaking despite her trying to keep it firm, she didn't take her eyes from the window when she talked to Merlin making it clear that she was trying to hide her tears.

"Oh Merlin" she said turning to him as his sobs became noticeable  to anyone that could hear.

Merlin felt his knees weaken, he felt them collide with the hard floor, he felt Gwen kneel beside him, he felt her hug him, he felt the warm tears streaming down his face but the pain of losing his best friend caught up with him at once and he didn't feel himself, he felt detached from his body, he felt like an observer of the moment in time.

"It's my fault Gwen, I should have protected him!" He said between breaths

"No! No Merlin it's not! You ridded of every evil my husband faced and I must thank you for that because if not for you, our king would have been dead long before I fell in love with him."