I Am Cameron

Untouchable

My phone chimes again, and I’m inclined to ignore it, but I look anyway.

Sure enough, it’s a message from Austin, another threat on my life that was getting really old really fast. I screenshot the message, making sure the time and date was visible.

January 3rd, 2019
8:52pm

I open my gallery and move the screenshot to my ever increasing ‘threat’ folder.

I don't know why the threats don't really affect me anymore. I mean, I know he's going to find me eventually. He could possibly kill me, something I've known since I was 10. It's not that I think that this house is an impenetrable fortress of solitude. When he does find me, I could always just leave to somewhere else, even if I'm not 18 yet. I have no idea where, but it I better start planning soon right?

The only thing I was planning right now was to head to the kitchen and get something to eat.

Overthinking is hunger inducing and that's a fact.

I get out of bed and throw on socks and the pajama shirt that matches my pants before heading out my room door. As I try to remember what was in the fridge and what I actually wanted to eat, I realize a cool current striking me. I stop, confused until I see that Trinity's door is open. Normally I wouldn't think anything of it, but I notice the sliding door to her balcony was open also. A lot of thoughts ran through my mind, mostly confusion, but I was fearful to what she could be doing or thinking of doing since she lost her brother.

Without a falter, I rush to her balcony and do a quick scan of the ground below. I don't see a body. That's  good. Then where did she go?

“Why”, she says, her voice coming from behind me. I turn around and see Trinity sitting on a lounge chair with a warm cup of tea and a red, checkered thermal blanket. I visibly relax at the scene.

“The… Your door was open, both of them actually, and I wanted to make sure you were safe”, I explain.

“Why wouldn't I be safe in my own room”, she asks. I stare at her before glancing over to the balcony. All of a sudden she sighs and nods.

“Thanks for the concern, but dying from sadness isn't a part of my plan anymore”, she says.

“Anymore?”

She inhales deeply, pulling her heated blanket closer to her body before speaking.

“I can't say I was thinking rationally a few weeks ago,  but I knew I wanted to be with my brother, my only protector as soon as possible. I can't not miss him and sometimes remembering that i can't hear him anymore makes the air thicker and breathing harder. It's like I'm shutting down on the inside and i wanted to match the inside with the outside…”

She pauses while staring at a random spot while smiling sadly.

“James would hate me if I joined him”, she inhales deeply before looking up at me. “So I won’t.”

I stare back at her for a few seconds before nodding.

“... That’s good. After all, it would be pretty unbearable if you weren’t here with all of us”, I confess. Trinity furrows her brow, tilting her head to the side slightly.

“I mean, think about it”, I start. “Elizabeth wouldn't be as open as she is now being the only female child. And you'd have never learned Bengali from her so only Gran and Thomas would know. Thomas wouldn't be as inclined to learn English. I hear him humming the songs you sing and sometimes he actually sings the songs in English. I'm not exactly sure about Oliver but it's obvious you affect him too. As for me, well, I'm still learning with you, but I'm glad I have an opportunity to learn what makes you, you.