Broken to Pieces

Home life

Chapter 6

Kali Iris's POV

I woke up in what I thought at first was my room because it was so dark, but in reality it was the Curtis living room. I still lay in the same position I feel asleep in yesterday. Sodapop had his head tilted back against the couch snoring. I carefully lifted my head up and off his lap not waking him up. I still felt extremely empty inside, my stomach and heart. I scurried to find my shoes. I did so and opened the squeaky door.

"And where do you think you're going?" I smooth voice asked, it belonged to sodapop.

"Back home" I muttered and ran out. I can't explain my actions around sodapop. I don't know what he sees in me, I mean if he even has feelings for me, which is almost impossible. Ugh it just makes me so mad it's like someone is controlling me... like someone is making me say stuff and do them too when I really just wanted to go and run into Sodapops arms. I'm so stressed and depressed with myself. I don't ask for attention or anything really. Yet I turned out a bitch.

I slammed the door from all of my anger.

"Ugh god I though you killed yourself already?" my sister said in between mouthfuls of popcorn.

"God, don't you you understand? I wish I could be as perfect as you... your body, your hair, your clothing. Yet I'm glad I'm not a total slut" I flicked her off.

"Ugh bitch" she threw the empty glass bowl that was full of popcorn probably twenty minutes ago. Glass flew everywhere around me, cutting my clothes, face, skin... and you know, I didn't mind the pain. It soothed me.

Then my mother came stomping down the stairs in her pajamas

"Kali Iris Marie Saming that bowl was a wedding gift. Ugh you worthless piece of shit, I wish you father would have never insisted on having another child. You're such a handful. I honestly can't stand you. I can't wait for you to leave for college, but wait you're an actual idiot. You'll never even graduate" my mother screamed very clearly making sure I heard every word loud and clear.

"I I I..." I stammered because of the anger

"See she doesn't even know how to speak, moron" my sister joked. My mother laughed.

"Mom how could I possibly broke the bowl. She was the one eating, anyways I don't eat. You forced this upon myself. I hate it, I hate that it's the only thing that feels right" I put my arms on my stomach showing how small it is. Then continued. "I hate the fact that you hate me, that I'm such a mistake when I walk around egg shells around you. It sucks mom, wait you're no motherly figure Susie..." I was cut off my her slapping me, hard.

"Well you at least know one thing, I do really hate you. Now pick up the glass before your sister gets cut, but I'm sure you know so much about treating cuts" she smirked and went upstairs. I quickly picked up the glass with a towel and three it away.

"Are you sure you don't want to keep them for your collection of knifes and blades?" my sister pushed me too far.

"I hate you" I spoke softly tears escaping my eyes. I took everyones advice and took out my collection. I pressed the blade against my wrist "one for Steve, who was right about my unnatural stomach size, one for my sister who is right about my collection of blades and knives and one for my mother who is right about me being an idiot" I stumbled through the tears. I added a few more for all the other people that were right about me, my teachers, neighbors, classmates everyone was right, I'm a freak. A self harm, crazy, idiotic freak that no one will ever like.

I slipped on a different black tight shirt and crawled into bed hoping to do the same routine for the next few days. Ugh no I can't I have school in less than 12 hours. Shoot me, maybe I should do it myself.

A/n

So do you guys think this chapter pushed too much of the self harm and everybody hates her kinda thing? please let me know. Your feedback helps a lot. I didn't exactly love this chapter because it just kinda sucks and wasn't what I wanted to write but oh well. The next chapter will be good. I just know it but I'm having a hard time deciding if I should introduce Sara, Kali's best friend or just do a day at school... Probably introduce Sara because she plays a big roll in this story and effects with kali in a few chapters.

I've said too much. Lolol

Xoxo stay gold