I was sitting on the couch watching the 3rd season of Keeping up with the Kardashians while I sat there underneath a large pile of tissues, blankets, and a big half eaten tub of cookie dough ice cream.
I finally truly understood what it felt like to have my heart ripped apart after I caught my boyfriend making out with my best friend. They were now both dead to me, but now I didn't have anyone to look to or have comfort me since they both decided to turn all my friends against me for no reason.
So instead of the warm hugs and comforting words of a friend I was reduced to drowning myself in the sugary dairyness, (if that is a word,) In ice cream.
Life sucked. So I decided that I would stay on my couch, my own refuge from the world, and watch TV until the world decided to shape up, or at least the people in it did. There would be no reason to leave except to go the bathroom and get more food since I had enough seasons of Glee, Friends, Crimial minds, Scooby doo, ect. Ect to last a lifetime.
One person who had the potential of being my friend and bearer of comfort was my older brother Namjoon, whom my family calls Rapmonster.
The only thing is that most of my life Rapmonster had not cared about me one bit. He never paid attention to me or did anything for me after I did things for him. Nope, nothing I could do or say would be good enough to get his attention. So that's why there was such a high level of shock when he actually asked if I was okay. I mean he actually talked to me out of his own free will.
He sat down on the couch next to me as I paused an episode of Glee.
He looked at me with concern and asked why I felt so devastated due to the loss of my ex and I answered him honestly, I said that I didn't really know why.
Rapmonster then continued to ask why I felt the need to waste time wallowing in TV shows and ice cream all because of a stupid boy.
I looked at him with tear filled eyes and said...
"Sometimes we make big deals out of nothing, because to use they aren't nothing. The affect us or change us in large ways. The fact that this happened between my best friend and my boyfriend has crushed my spirit an sense of trust that I now cannot give to anyone else. What happened hurt me lot, and yes, even though he is a dumb replaceable boy the things he did hurt me and to me that is not nothing."
I took a deep breath and exhaled.
"That's why sometimes I need to just shut out the world on live on the couch for a while, living on TV show series and ice cream. I need to rest and regain the feelings an virtues I've lost. It's not nothing, it's a big deal, to me."
Rapmonster just sat there staring at me as I finished talking.
We sat in silence for a moment until Rapmonster jumped forward and hugged me, pulling me into his arms.
I pushed himself away from me and said ... "I finally understand what you're going through, and you no longer have to deal with it alone. From this day forward you will never be alone."
After that Rapmonster nuzzled his way onto the couch next to me, not without grabbing a second spoon of course, and dug into the ice cream as I pressed play and we watched glee together.
That was the day we became best friends for life? Besides what other best friend could be better than your brother?
