"You just got to think about it creatively." He started laughing again and I frowned in confusion. "I mean pool your thoughts into a hobby. That's what dad told me to do... even though creativity is not my department."
"A hobby? Wait... How does a hobby help?" Roe asked as he glanced over at me. I smiled and grabbed several of the flowers that were littered about. I didn't even look at what I was doing. I've done it so many times it practically second nature. Although I would be caught dead before I let any of the other sides know I do this. I just spend a lot of time in the garden. "What are you..." His eyes lit up as I placed the crown on his head. It fit him. Even if I couldn't see behind the mask, I knew he was meant for a crown. He took it off and just stared at the flowers smiling a little. "How?"
"It was a hobby. From back when I was smaller. I would have all these panic attacks and... well I would run to the garden and just get lost in the colors." He looked up at me with his eyes wide and I laid back in the grass. "I've learned that doing something you like and feel proud of, helps to distract you a bit. Sometimes even enough to stop the panic altogether. I think that's why so many people love Thomas. His videos help them through so much. To be honest I..." I stopped and looked away feeling my chest slowly start to close.
"To be honest you what?" I shook my head and rolled over looking away from him. I can't believe I actually let my guard down. Even if it was slightly. I was talking about how I felt to a total fucking stranger. My breathing started to get shallow and I gripped my shirt tightly. I am such a moron. What if they know it's me and use what I say against me? What if they're super mean and twist everything I say to make everyone else hate me? What if Roman find out what I say? "Hey, what's wrong? Did I say something? Was it me? I'm sorry if it is. I don't..."
"Wow, you're almost as anxious as I am." And that's saying something. Roe got up and moved off to where I was looking and laid down facing me. His face was sad but his eyes were caring. I just sighed and rolled myself up into a half fetal position. "It's not you. I just... I realized how transparent I was being... I got scared. That's typical for me though. I close off and get mouthy. I just piss everyone off." he hesitantly held his hand out and grabbed mine.
"You don't piss me off." I scoffed and rolled over looking up at the stars.
"You just haven't known me long. I mean, the way Roman... Nevermind." His eyes went wide and I could see the shock in him. "What?"
"Roman? What about Roman? What did he do?" I shot him a concerned look as the panic rose up in me again. I fucked up. I said something I shouldn't have. He's going to tell Roman and that asshole will make my life even more hell. He grabbed my hand again and I looked over to see a soft and worried expression. "It's ok... I just... I need to know. What about Roman?"
"He's mean." His eyes went dark and I looked away. "That's all ok. Roman is just mean... to me. It's like there are two sides to him. This kind caring prince that everyone loves and them the asshole that targets me all the damn time. I mean WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE PARTNERS!" I slammed my hand over my mouth and winced as my heart started racing.
"P-partners?" I nodded and looked away as the tears started to fall. "What do you mean?"
"He's supposed to work with me. He's supposed to help me. Not help WITH me. I know I'm an issue, ok? Who actually wants Anxiety but..." He jumped up so fast I got whiplash. I jumped in surprise and frowned. "... I'm just doing my job."
"You're Anxiety?" The way his voice broke made me want to run and hide. Here we go. You just had t say something and now he's going to hate you. Damn it, Virgil! "Wait I'm confused. How is Creativity your partner?"
"I just told you I was Thomas's Anxiety and nothing? I'm the big bad fear-inducing side and you don't make a single comment. You just continue the convo as if I said nothing." He rubbed his arm and shrugged. I could see the fear in his eyes and I groaned. Maybe I should just go.
"I don't care that you're Anxiety. Well, I do but not for the reason you must think." I raised an eyebrow at him and he laughed awkwardly. "You let me talk about some of my crap, so you can talk about some of yours. It might be nice to have someone to talk to."
"Sounds like you plan to meet up with me again?" He smiled and I found myself smiling back. "Ok, then? You asked how Roman was my partner?" He nodded and I shook my head in wonder. "He's my opposite. Like how Logan keeps Patton on point and Patton helps Logan see the importance of things. They help each other. He's supposed to help me."
"I don't understand." I don't understand why you care... I rolled my eyes and ran a hand through my hair.
"I don't know ok. I just know what they told me. I get my part. I keep Thomas safe. I try to keep him safe." I shook myself from my thought and Roe sat back down beside me. "I can go a bit too far but... I don't mean to. I can't help it. Everything is so scary and I'm alone. It terrifies me so much. And then Roman come in and starts yelling, making it all so much worse." He winced and I gripped my hair pulling myself into a fetal position again. "He's just trying to help Thomas but all he ever does is yell at me. He yells and says all these mean things."
"But... don't you give it back to him?" He looked away and I felt the tears start to fall.
"What else am I supposed to do. I'm scared shitless all the time, but them knowing that is even scarier. I can't just let him know how I feel. That gives him something to use against me. So... I act mean. Hence why I say I just piss everyone off."
"I'm sure that's..."
"Virgil?" I looked up to see Caz standing there confused and I smiled. I jumped up and pulled him into a hug, feeling myself shaking terribly. "Jesus, your shaking. Are you ok?"
"I'm good. It's just my anxiety again." Caz frowned as he glared over at Roe. "He was helpful. So be nice."
"You had me worried you know. You weren't at your usual spot." I pulled away and pulled my mask off. I was exhausted and done with it all.
"I couldn't get to it. I was out here for most of the party." I looked back over at Ro and his eyes were wide. I forgot I had this makeup on. "We were talking. Can we just go or..."
"Yeah, Logan's calling it quits on the party tonight. Patton had a bit too much of the spiked punch. No doubt Remy's doing." I laughed as Caz started to lead me away. I looked back seeing Ro one last time as he started to pull his mask off. I looked away and frowned. Whoever that was...
He was actually really nice.
YOU ARE READING
*Discontinued* Masquerade~Haitus (Needs Rewritting)
Fanfikce(This is my own personal Masquerade!Au. It's the first ever story using this Au so I hope you like it!) #3~Princy (2/22) I don't have a description yet cuz whatever lol. I'll write one later. This is a Loceit and Prinxiety book! I WILL CONTINUE THIS...