Amethystale//Vessel of the Heart

CHAPTER 5//Part 1

Inner War

WARNING: Mature Audience

Reason: Foul Language

Grillby had given the two some space, and a few selections of drinks while they talked, going back to attend to his job, and keeping an ear out encase he was ever needed.

Sans had gone quiet after the explanation on Frisk's sacrifice. The large knife still in his hands as he slumped against a wall. Susan fixing them both some drinks; she didn't know if she could make any small talk, since Sans seemed to trapped in his own thoughts. So she kept herself busy, but still provided a bit of conversation encase Sans ever wanted to join in. 

"I don't know what you guys see in the surface. Speaking from experience, this place you guys have is almost ten times better...despite being a prison." Fiddling with a few shot glasses on the ground, one of which was full with a shot ready of red whiskey. "Yeah it's open up there, and it's a world to explore...but it's the humans you should avoid. Ironic that it's a human saying that too...but it's the sad truth."

Susan took the small shot glass and downed it's contents quickly. The sting on her tongue, and flame down her throat made her couch a bit, till a warm tingly fire settled in her stomach. "Fuck the Surface to be honest." She looked to Sans, whom hadn't moved an inch besides his eyes, which were now closed. "I know, it's not what you want to hear. If i was still up there, and knew this place existed rather then thought it was a myth, I would of volunteered to jump down here. Either that, or get out of the city, live in whatever land I could travel too. Go through the thick of the forest past the Mountain." 

She began pouring more whiskey into her shot-glass, she knew what she could handle but at that moment, it seemed like time was frozen, and not a care in the world could break it. "Sometimes, when I was in that orphanage, I'd try to sleep the day away. Didn't always work; Sleeping life away is hard when it's your soul that's tired. But I tried despite all that. My dreams was where I could really be me, do what I want. Nothing would go bad." She downs the shot, her gaze to the shot-glass in her hand. She can feel Sans attention on her now, at least that was something. "I know what you saw was hard to witness. Nothing in this life is fair, or what we want...doesn't mean we can't keep going forward with the knowledge you have now." 

Susan pours a bit more in the shot-glass this time, the burn from the first shot not as bad now, and with a belly full of food, and the good whiskey, she felt better if not a tad tired. "You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending." She was about to pour another shot when Sans hand covered the whiskey bottle. She was just about to pour her fifth shot, and she was slightly swaying, but not to noticeable to the untrained eye. 

"I'm guessing your feeling good right now." Sans joked, but there was no smile to back it up. He stayed where he was, looking at a slightly dazed Susan. "At least you have one thing I don't have up there Sans..." she murmured, her voice just a bit high pitched even at the tone she used.

"You have a brother, and he cares deeply about you. You have friends, and they look worried when you turn away. You have people who know you, even if it's only ten percent." Her head dips to the side, a hand going through her brown stripped hair. "I don't have anyone. I don't trust anyone easily, and I don't know why that is. Maybe it's because I've got no one to put my loyalty toward, my trust to open up too." She shrugs a bit and a smile creeped back to her lips, "But ever since I came down here, even with the rocky start. I feel...like..." She stutters a bit, trying to think of a good comparison, "Like I belong here. Like i should of belonged here from the start. You all took me in at my worst state of mind, and you and your brother are trying to nurture me back to health. At what cost, what benefit?" Her hand now squeezed against her skull, the dizzy feeling getting a bit stronger now, "Why, Sans?" 

Sans gaze never moved, he only listened as she slowly broke down into tears now. He whispers, "What do you mean, Susan?" Both her hands were to her face now, trying to shield the waterworks. As if Sans didn't already see them coming. "Why do you care what happens to me. Why did you care from the start, and why do you care now?" She sobbed into her winter coat. Her face may of been hidden, but the emotions she had was spilling like a full glass with a crack at the bottom. 

Sans kept silent. He wouldn't answer her question, there was too much to tell. But in the dire time, Susan was spilling some very pent up feelings, like a spitting image of himself way back when he had night terrors about Papyrus dying over and over again. 

Sans moved carefully and delicately, almost as silent as a ghost, fixing himself behind Susan now and pulling her into an embrace; one arm around her chest, holding onto the opposite shoulder, the other carefully wrapped around her stomach, hand to her side. Sans leaned both of themselves back against the wall they had both been leaning on. 

She was surprised as he did this, but gave no hint for him to stop. Relieved more than confused, her sobbing lessened and her tense shoulders leaned, becoming more relaxed. It took her a minute to realize how tense she actually was, her mind had been buzzing with so many doubts about herself, now it was like an ocean wave blowing through and calming every essence of her mind. The alcohol being a bigger help now, lulling her still watery eyes closed as her mind drifted to sleep.