Uncontrollable Fire.

ik ure probably busy buttt im soooo bored

Katsuki awoke someone shaking him, and his breaths coming in short bursts, pins and needles lodged in his throat. He doesn't remember getting to his feet all he knews is his back is now pressed against the wall aching.

Clawing at his neck does nothing to help air get into his lungs, his heart beating a mile a minute. The panic wells as he thinks of the dream that causes these things, her unyielding gaze.

Her eyes staring at him now, she looks scared she never looked scared. Why does she look so different?

"Daddy?"

Reflexively flinches back when she comes closer. Bring his arms over his head, he has to protect himself, she won't get the better of him this time.

Breathing still rough, still too fast. Tears leaking down his face. A gentle finger touches him, his breathing hitching.

"Dad, you're scaring me," The voice is weak, she's crying.

Something soft being shoved into his hands, shakily bringing it to his chest. It clicks into place as he looks at the toy in his hold, eyes too close together, smile too big.

He looks up at his daughter, tears sluggishly moving down her cheeks. She tries to give a weak smile, he drops of the stuffie off to the side, bringing Kaede into his arms, cradling her to his chest, he takes a slow breath in, rocking her softly, her clenching onto his sweater.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he whispers under his breath, he can't tell if it's for her or himself.

His thoughts slowly coming back, he'd fallen asleep on the couch earlier that afternoon, too many night shifts with early shifts the next morning. He should've gone to his room at least, he would have dealt with this alone, it was stupid to be anywhere near Kaede when his nightmares were acting up, she shouldn't have to see him that way, no one should.

Kaede doesn't leave his side of the rest of the day even when he tells her repeatedly to go play, he almost tripped over her twice well cleaning, and making dinner.

When dinner is served she's quiet, keeping to herself, cupcake sat atop her lap, when they're nearing done, she speaks up.

"Are you okay?"

He can't lie to her but the truth will only hurt more in the long run, he turns on the sink to start washing dishing, sparing himself a few seconds.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Not elaborating. He watches out of the corner of his eye as she jumps down from her chair, bringing her dishes to the counter, she runs off with one glance over her shoulder.

He cleans until the apartment couldn't possibly be cleaner. Kaede leaving for bed at some point between mopping and dusting.

His phone keeps buzzing even as he tucks Kaede in, even after he retires to the living room. Tv's sound off, only subtitles sort of making sense as he watches on.

He doesn't think he can make it through another year of this, he keeps waiting for himself to finally feel like going back to school.

And maybe some part of him is still waiting for her to come back, to give in. even if he's the one who left.

She could always find him.

His thoughts are interrupted by his phone buzzing more persistently against his thigh.

9:08pm
Unknown number: do u think they purposely give me the most boring time of the night?

9:23pm

Unknown number: cuz i think they r,,,, do u think my boss is out to get me??

9:39pm

Unknown number: ik ure probably busy buttt im soooo bored

10:06pm

Unknown number: gold fish r weird why do we need a snack that smiles back? thats kinda weird as heck,,,,

Library boss: Can you work tomorrow?

Me: yeah

Unknown number: KIDS EAT GOLDFISH,,, THATS A BAD LESSON. THEYRE NOT FRIENDLY DONT EAT THE SMILING FISH

Me: i think you're overreacting

Unknown number: that is ABSOLUTELY possible

Unknown number: idk i was just thinking about it bc i was eating em

Me: ...

Unknown number: thats a valid point, thank u for that wonderful insight.

Me: no.

Unknown number: u know its really starting to get hard to talk to u

Me: good.

Unknown number: come on! Ik ud be lonely without me

Me: thats a bold thing to assume.

Unknown number: yeye

Unknown number: ok maybe id be a little lonely without u

Me: you don't even know me.

Unknown number: yeah but work is lonekyl

Unknown number: loney

Unknown number: loenly

Me: please stop.

Unknown number: lonely :'(

Me: bye

Unknown number: but :''(

Me: i will block you

Unknown number: oh