DESTIEL. Awoken feelings

Part 2

When Castiel saw Dean first time after Michael left the hunter's body, he saw the righteous man he fell in love with all those years ago. First time when Castiel felt something, for the first time in his really long life, was when he touched men's soul in hell, then the feeling repeated in a barn in  Illinois right after being summoned by Dean and Bobby in September 2008.

Even when emotions and feelings were new to the angel, he knew that the hunter was "lady's man" and he chose a man's body as his vessel.  So he hides his feelings deep down but he wanted to be close to Dean, so he started to have "problems" with "personal space". Even though he was close to the hunter for a short time it was amazing to the angel.

Over the years Castiel's feelings grew stronger and stronger. After some time he learned what those feelings are, that this is LOVE. The love was so strong, that sometimes the angel felt like it overpowers him but he knew that he must control himself, that Dean will never feel the same way.

His love was strong but the feeling of pain was sometimes even stronger. Especially when Dean had his one-night stands. Those hurt the most. Although the angel didn't want to show Dean that, because he preferred to be his friend, even when it hurt him than nobody.  He prefers to suffer seeing hunter's hook-ups that didn't be close to him at all.

Angel started fell every possible emotion.

When Metatron tricked him and threw the angels from Heaven, took his grace and made him human and emotions started overpowers him, making him feel miserable, love for Dean hold him sane and alive. The heartbreak when Hunter made him leave him and the bunker was almost killed him. He hoped that Dean will change his mind and he would have to live to wait for that, to be close to his love. So he waited. And everything turned to be like he wanted, even with few bumps in the road.

And now he is here again, near Dean after Micheal's case. And he feels a little like he has wings again.  He is happy to Dean is back.

When Dean decided to say yes to Michael, Cas felt like somebody took his heart out of his chest and that he couldn't breathe.  Angel felt hopeless because he knew what could happen to Hunter.  But he couldn't do anything. Again he lost his Dean, his human, his Love.

In his mind was always one thought: will ever Dean love him back more than a brother? or all his faults and knowledge about Castiel's feelings will make hunter hate him to the end of his life? But Castiel still has a little faith and a lot of hope that Dean would let him be his friend and stay close to him.

Future will show.