Destiny- Byron Miller

~6~

(Photo is of Bailey)

The next few weeks of my life were crazy.

Bailey gradually got healthier and healthier and finally went home after so many weeks in the NICU.

Tomorrow is my 18th birthday. December 19. I am both excited and terrified.

The relationship I have with my mother is still almost nonexistent. Just because she had a baby, doesn't mean all the past struggles dissolved.

My mom stopped drinking for the most part while she was pregnant.

That has changed again too.

The beer bottles are back.

Oh and Donald is gone too. I think he ran off to Russia.

So now there is three kids, all with three non-involved fathers, with three different last names.

We're now the Miller-Harrison-Gills family.

I don't even know what my moms last name is anymore.

I think it might be Harrison?

But, a lot has changed.

I got a much better job. I enjoy it more, I have a nice boss, my coworkers are great, and it pays a lot more.

And instead of only Amanda watching Maisie, one of my classmates that I've been friends with since 2nd grade watches her sometimes.

Her name is Harper. She has a sister Maisie's age named Aila. Maisie goes over to their house every other day. She alternates between Harper and Amanda's care. Either way Maisie is happy and that's all that matters.

Multiple times I have gotten home and Bailey has been left unattended while my mother was out to the bar.

It's really disgusting and disappointing to say that she is my mother. Me, Maisie, and Bailey deserve better than her.

December 20 is the day that I go to court to get custody of not only Maisie, but Bailey now too.

Bailey may not be aware of the situation she is in, but I know that Maisie understands.

Maisie is afraid of our mother. She refuses to go near her. She is much happier with me.

I've asked her multiple times, "If you had the choice, would you want to live with me or mom?" and every single time without a doubt or hesitation, the answer is always me.

I can only assume Bailey would rather me than our mom because no child would want our mother as a mom.

No one.

So now I'm laying in my bed with Maisie snuggled into my side and Bailey's crib right next to my bed.

I don't know where my mom is at night. She's not here. And honestly I'm happy she's never home at night. That's less of a worry than when she is home, though.

• • •

When I woke up in the morning my mother still wasn't home. That was more of a birthday present than anything else.

I woke up at 7 due to Bailey's crying, but was happy nonetheless. Maisie has grown immune to Bailey's crying and luckily stayed asleep.

No one knows that it is my birthday today. I don't like my birthday. It always brings back memories of my 10th birthday when my dad was there.

(flashback)

I'm so excited for today. I've been waiting for this day since the day I found out about symbols. Today I get my symbol.