Joanne through the years.

Always On My Mind

Dianne

A new year, a new beginning.  That's what everyone always said, wasnt it?  People always said really cliché things at new year.  But a new year, a new beginning had to be the biggest cliche of the lot.  There is no such thing as a new beginning.  You can only try improve your old ways.  You can't just start over again.  That's impossible.
I gazed out at the dark sky.  I was alone.  My family were all inside celebrating their new beginning as the clock struck midnight but I didnt want a new beginning.  I liked my life.  In fact, I had everything I wanted.
I had a family that loved and cared for me.  I had my best friends that were always there for me. And I had Joe.  I wasnt quite sure who he was to me yet.  We were only friends.  But maybe it was more than that.  I didnt cuddle, hug, hold hands or sleep in the same bed with any of my other friends.  Joe was special.  He was my special little friend that I could tell everything to and he would always listen and always comfort me.
I thought that I was missing Australia whenever I was in London but now I was in Australia I just wanted to go back to London.  London was my home now and there were so many more oppurtunites for my dancing in London.  I had already competed in numerous competitions in the 5 short months that I had lived there.
"You alright Dot?" My brother Andrew came and sat beside me.
"Yeah.  Just thinking" I leaned my head against his shoulder.
"About what?" he asked curiously.
"About life back in London" I said.
"I don't like it much in London.  Its too noisy and Australia's far prettier.  And its cold in London. And it smells" He added.  I laughed.
"You speak the truth but im happier in London.  I have friends there."

"You have Oti here" he looked at me confusedly.

"She moved back to South Africa.  We havent talked since" i muttered gloomily.
"Do you have a boyfriend in London?" Andrew smirked slightly.
"No.  Why?"
"Because on boxing day, some boy walked you home and then you hugged and I've seen you around school with this boy. You never leave his side. You also go to his house almost every single day and you spent the whole day plus the night at his on Christmas day."
"You're very observant" I muttered.
"So are you two dating?" He asked me excitably.  "Cause if you are then I'm gonna need to give him the 'big brother talk'".
"No.  Hush big one.  We arent dating.  We are just really good friends.  I'm also good friends with his sister and all my other friends are friends with him so thats why."
"Well...you two look like a couple" he grinned.
"Shut up" I punched him playfully in the arm. 

Joe

I walked with Zoe on the first day back to school. I was so gloomy that we had to go back to school so near after the new year.
"You excited to see Dianne?" Zoe peered up at me.
"Yeah" I said.
"You dont sound it" Zoe frowned.
"Well I sure feel it" I grinned at her. Suddenly excited at the prospect of seeing Dianne after so long.
"I knew that would excite you" she grinned.  I suddeny sped up. "Why you walking so fast?"
"Why'd ya think Zo" I rolled my eyes.
I spotted Dianne by the gate and slowed down slightly so I didn't look like I was rushing.
"Hey Suggy" she ran over to me and wrapped her arms around me.
"I missed you Reddo" I hugged her back.
"Same" We let go after several minutes.  We would have hugged for longer but Zoe coughed one of THOSE coughs.  Which signalled to us that we needed to stop hugging.

Dianne

Joe, Zoe and I began to walk towards the school. I looked down at Joes free hand, swaying slightly as he walked.  Should i grab it?  Before I could make my decision however, Joe slid his own hand into mine and held it. I held his back. We walked into school hand in hand. Many people stared at us as we walked in with our hands linked. Rose and her clones looked like they had been slapped in the face.
"Why's everyone pointing at us?" Zoe whispered in my ear.
"Not you. Just Joe and me" I whispered back.  Zoe looked down and she grinned broadly whenever she noticed that we were holding hands.  We walked over to the lads at their usual table in the canteen.  Whenever they saw Joe and me they put their heads together and began talking in hushed voices.
"Morning everyone" Joe said as we sat down. I sat down on the seat beside him, not wanting to attract anymore attention by sitting on his lap.  We remained holding hands however.
"So. Whats changed?" Caspar leaned acrss the table eagerly. Everyone leaned in.
"What?" Joe asked confusedly.  Everyone nodded towards our intertwined hands. "Oh that" Joe laughed nervously. "We're not dating" He said firmly.
"Then quit getting our hopes up then" Mikey sat back on his stool.  I laughed.

 
The next few weeks went quickly.  The routine stayed the same except for the fact that Joe and I were becoming closer by the day.  Most of the school assumed that we were going out and this didnt seem to bother Joe as it got Rose and her clones off his back.  But part of me wanted the rumours to be true.  I wanted to be with Joe.  I wanted to be his girlfriend not just his friend.
"Dianne. Concentrate" my dance teacher snapped.  I fell over.  I was at dance practice and the teacher had evidently been trying to talk to me.  I picked myself up off the floor.  Everyone was staring.
"Sorry" I apologised.
"Now.  Please can you concentrate.  The lights are on but no ones home. Thats what its like anyway" she frowned at me. "Actually Dianne, can I talk to you for a second?"  Without waiting for a reply she pulled me roughly to the side. My dance teacher was only a few years older than me. She had won loads of competitions world wide and could have gone on to win more if she hadnt got injured and reduced to teaching instead. she was actually one of Zoes best friends. I wondered what Joe was doing right now.  Probably playing army with Caspar.  "DIANNE" a voice shouted.
"Oh sorry" my head snapped up.
"You have to concentrate.  You have a massive competition coming up. This could be life changing. You win this competition and a lot of doors will open up to you.  But you need to listen to what I'm saying and concentrate on your dancing. What are you thinking about? Or who are you thinking about?" she looked at me and I stared straight on back.
"I wasn't thinking of anything of importance" I muttered.
"I heard that you recently aquired yourself a boyfriend" She said.  My head jerked up.
"Thats not true."
"What do you mean? Of course its true. It's the topic of the school. You are dating Joe Sugg."
I shook my head. "We're just good friends. The dating rumours are made up."
"Do you want to date him?" she looked at me intensely.
"Yeah but he doesnt feel the same way at all" I mumbled miserably.
"I'm sure he does" she put a hand on my shoulder. "Just talk to him about it" she advised.
"No way. Are you crazy Jess?" I asked her. Shock flitting across my face.
"No" She smiled. "I've seen the way you two are together. You're made for one another. Just talk to him about it" Jess smiled.
"Thanks Jess. I'll try. Maybe. Soon. But right now im gonna focus on dancing" I high fived her and we made our way back to the main training area where constant thoughts of Joe continued to creep into my mind.