(Hey guys i'm not dead apparently! This is based off a song of course because yeah. Also i've basically fallen out of the fandom, this will be really bad. Also also, you guys can clearly see who my sort of favorite is right? 😅)
"Baby, I don't feel so good," six words you never understood,
You sat at the lunch table with Susie and Kris, Picking at your food. You were thinking about things, so you weren't really paying attention when Susie called your name. "(Y/N)! Hey!" She semi-yelled. You came out of your thoughts, looking at her. "You alright?" She asked. You nodded. "Yeah, sorry i just don't feel good." You said. She scoffed. "Sure."
"I'll never let you go," five words you'll never say
The truth was, you were thinking about Susie. She had always been rude, but she seemed to be even ruder to you most times. Though...you had developed a crush on her.
I laugh along (i know its alone) like nothing's wrong, four days has never felt so long
You had been sitting with Kris and Susie at their table for four days now, laughing along at their jokes that put you down, pretending that they didn't hurt. You didn't want susie to think you were weak, so when she cracked another joke, you just laughed slightly.
If three's a crowd and two was us, one slipped away
You tried to stay out of your thoughts, but eventually your thoughts caught up to you and you had to leave. You excused yourself quietly, quickly leaving the cafeteria and going to the bathroom.
I just wanna make you feel okay
But all you do is look the other way
You gripped onto the sides of a sink, just staring into the mirror. You didn't feel like crying, no. You were mad. You just wanted to know why she hated you so much. Why she'd pay attention to everyone else but you. All these thoughts ran through your head, they were so loud that you didn't even notice someone walk into the bathroom. The person tapped onto your shoulder, to which you looked at them. It was Susie. Great. You sighed. "What." Was all you said, anger clear in your voice. "Why'd you run off like that? I spent like...10 minutes looking for you." She said in an annoyed voice. "I can't tell you how much I wish I didn't wanna stay" you said. She seemed confused. You sighed. "I just kinda wish you were gay" you mumbled.
((TIMESKIP HAHA SUSPENSE))
Is there a reason we're not through?
Is there a 12 step just for you?
You had just got home from school about an hour ago. You were currently sat staring at your phone, waiting for a reply to your texts from Susie.
Our conversation's all in blue
11 "heys"
As you stared at your phone, you realized just how many "Heys" you had sent. 11. Great, now you seem desperate. You send one more, just to be even. But this one got a reply.
Ten fingers tearing out my hair
Nine times you never made it there
(Y/N): Hey
S: Hey
(Y/N): Look, about what i said...
S: its fine.
(Y/N): u okay?
...
No reply.
You growled in anger. She waited so long to text you. Just to not reply for more than two texts!? You layed down on your bed, sighing.
I ate alone at 7, you were six minutes away
Once you were done sulking, you got up to eat. Surprisingly, Susie would come over a lot of the time to hang out while you ate since your parents weren't home a lot. But she didn't show up today. You layed your head on the table, picking at your food like at lunch earlier that day.
How am I supposed to make you feel okay
When all you do is look the other way?
When you finished "eating," you went back to your room, deciding to just sleep the pain away, like everyone else. You got dressed, got ready, and climbed into bed, closing your eyes and sighing. "I can't tell you how much I wish I didn't wanna stay.
I just kinda wish you were gay.." you mumbled before falling asleep.
((TIMESKIIIIIP))
To spare my pride
To give your lack of interest an explanation
Don't say I'm not your type
Just say that I'm not your preferred sexual orientation
It was the next day of school. Your whole class had been given free time because you finished work early, so you had been writing a letter to Susie, confessing how you felt. Once you finished, you stood up, walking over to Susie. She nodded at you. You handed her the letter and she read it, sighing. "(Y/N), i don't like you like that." She said. You were sort of shocked at how fast she replied that, but you looked down, nodding. You walked back to your seat slowly, hearing the girl laughing quietly with Kris.
I'm so selfish
But you make me feel helpless, yeah
And I can't stand another day
Stand another day
As you sat down at your desk, you felt tears welling up in your eyes. You layed your head down on your desk, letting tears fall down on your cheeks. You thought you heard someone call your name, but when you looked up, No one was there.
((Timeskip to the end of school, also trigger warning, it gets kinda sad.))
I just wanna make you feel okay
But all you do is look the other way
I can't tell you how much I wish I didn't wanna stay
You walked through the emptying school hallway. You remembered that time that Susie and Kris fell somewhere, but they came back? You didn't believe them, but you believed that they found somewhere that they couldve fell from. So you were walking to that closet, ready to end the problem that Susie had bothering her. As you walked to the closet and stepped inside, you felt the ground shake, and you fell.
I just kinda wish you were gay
((Lets just assume you fuckin died ight? Because we all know you didn't but HEY whatever? Also, im goin to the beach tomorrow with my friend so ayyyy fun timessss!))
