Never want to let you go a Calum Hood fan fiction

Chapiter 13

Chapiter 13 : 

I walked into my room then shut the door closed , i throwed myself on my bed then burried my body under the sheets , my head rested on the pilliow and my eyes started to feel heavy i was exhausted phisically and mentally , i closed my eyes and all the memories and flashbacks from the minut i met him for the first time to the friendship we had kept during years to the "jealousy" secenes , the moment he finally admited he liked me , our first kiss , our first date, those times i made him laugh those times he has helped me feel better till that very last conversation we had Every.Single.Detail it was so painful i just wished i could open my chest and rip my heart out . When i woke up my pillow felt wet and so did my cheeks and eyes my head felt like it weighed more than my body i felt like i was drunk . I checked the time it was 6 am but honestly it didn't matter to me at all i got out of bed then washed my zombie/ghost looking face , my parents were sleeping i just took a bottle of water then sat on the couch to watch tv maybe that would free my mind a bit i came down the channels that all seemed un-intersting to me i pressed the ok button of the remote to some kids show i needed some colors and hapiness and all that crap but it didnt seem like it was working , i kept staring at the tv then opened the bottle of water and drank about half of it and i sat there the clock kept ticking , hours passed by , 10am-11am-12am lunch time! Mum made my favourite meals but they all seemed like trash to me i went back to my room slept then woke up for the same rootines almost everyday i got some visits from ines and zack once in a while , they tried to help me out but nothing happened . I felt empty and numb from my feelings its like i kept feeling the pain of the break up in my heart but that was the only thing i could feel i didn't care if it was cold or sunny , if i ate or drank , if i lived or died because what's the point of living a life like that? I lost my best friend, my boyfriend , my sunshine , my other half because without him here i'am looking all pathetic like a mess . Days passed by acording to mum i have spent two weeks like that and i had to make a change , i ignored her then turned on the tv there was this celebrity show talking about the lastest stars and gossip all that crap i felt like a wave of feelings hit me as i saw him he was there with his band mates talking about how big their career was getting he looked happy and satisfied "So Calum" the interviewer asked " You and Monica made it official a week ago ? how is it going ?" " Great " he replied a big smile on his face" so you guys have actually been in a secret relationship a while ago right ?" " Yeah about a month " "hum Calum the fans still have some questions about some girl called Lindsay she apparently happened to be in a relationship with you before your career became what it is now , so tell me is it because you're becoming a big star now you just want let's say "better options "?" A serious expression suddenly took over Calum face as he lowered his head "Lindsay was a great friend of ours and to be honest she had all the "options" a guy could ask for" said Ashton "yes she was very sweet and always supported us with our music " followed Luke "To be fair we still don't understand calums choice " said Michael "but he is free to do what he likes after all" he continued "so does that mean you guys don't like Monica?" "No we like her she is very sweet too" answered Luke "its just we are quite protective of Lindsay because she is our friend " he followed "Lindsay if you're watching this we miss you and hope you are doing okay" said Michael waving to the camera . I started crying again remebering how great times we had together "i miss you too" i whisper tears streaming down my face , calum sat there looking at the ground his jaw clenching a bit "another question from the fans is what was your insperation to write your album ?" The interview followed i kept watching those four idiots taking over the world the guys reactions cheered me up a bit so i went to the bathroom then decided to try and change those habbits i have been addicted to lately , i took a shower and got changed i called ines and decided to hang out at starbucks .

"How you feeling lindsay?" She asked "i dont know Ines im feeling empty" i replied taking a sip of my coffee "well you know getting out of the house is a good sign already" "i guess" i answered "life goes on Lindsay you know maybe you can meet someone else and you know just move on" "maybe " "how about some shopping ?" Said Ines excited "c'mon you know you want to " i sighed then agreed to go with her . We walked around at a few at some stores and tried some clothes we were just goofing around having fun i don't know i just went with the flow and decided i wanted to have fun too . After that amazing day we had i went back home quite satisfied of my day i forgot how good it felt to have fun , my parents were very happy " I'm very proud of you Lindsay" Said my dad " Boys like him are not worth crying for just keep living your life" he said rubbing the top of my head .  Later that night i went to my laptop and scrolled down twitter some of the fans tweeted stuff like " tbh i wasn't in the fandom when Cal was with you but i really do ship you too bad" or " i don't understand why Cal choosed Monica over you !! #CalindsayForever" and some other fans tweeted me stuff like " you're so fugly eww thank god Cal got rid of you" " WTF Was Calum drunk during ur whole relationship #GladItsOver" "You sound and look so stupid you're worthless that's why Calum left you" i ignored both and just kept scrolling down till this update account started posting pictures of the last time  Calum hanged out with Monica  I finally could put a face on her name she looked absolutly gorgeous , she was the perfect skinny brunette with amzing shiny hazel eyes and tanned perfect skin , as her lips parted it revealed a straight whitened line of teeth , She had all the right junk in all the right places probably the same height as me but a 300 times better version than me in the pics Cal had his arms around her shoulder as they were walking around, in another one they were kissing Cal seemed to be enjoying that kiss a lot no wonder he choose her she was his ideal type of girl . My self steem litteraly vanished as i kept looking trough the pictures she was flawless and they made a very cute couple . 

I shut my laptop closed then head to the strairs to bring some water , suddenly the doorbell rang and i was too lazy to go check , my dad did , i sort of heard this familiar voice speak up , My dads voice started to take a more angry tone , I approch the door slowly " You are not gonna see her !!" my dad shouted " Please sir just let me talk to her for one second"   i came closer " Lindsay go back to your room " my dad  ordered but i ignored him i pushed the door a little more open to see Calum my eyes fielled with tears " Hey " he said with a sad face almost whispering " i just wanted to check on you " he followed "  ....