Salvation [manxman]

Chapter 34

Chapter 34

I hadn't been home in a while. I had made sure to hire a fellow nymph to look after Erebus since the fusing and unfusing had knocked him out and he hadn't regained consciousness, even after being fused back to a vessel. I had spent the first day taking care of him but the longer I looked at his face, the stronger the conflict was brewing inside of me and I decided to leave. I needed some time for myself and Nolan happily took me in.

"Good morning." Nolan chirped, walking into the kitchen holding Mateo's hand.

"Morning." I huffed, glaring at my tea cup as if I wanted it to confess to murdering someone. 

It was their home and they could do whatever they pleased but watching them show affection towards each other was still setting me off. It reminded me of what I had lost and I was doing a really good job at suppressing these thoughts if they weren't around. I felt guilty for wanting them to stop expressing their feelings just because it made me feel awful and that made everything even worse. I was being selfish.

"Do you want to watch this show on gardening with me while we eat breakfast?" Nolan asked, handing me a bowl. "I want to invest into a bee friendly garden."

His only son who was still living with them was sleeping over at his friend's house which meant Nolan was going to dig through all the unhealthy food he kept hidden for occassions like this while binch watching shows that dealt with decorating your house, managing your garden and keep your relationship healthy. I couldn't understand why he liked it but I had to say his house looked well kept and nicely decorated and they hadn't gotten a divorce yet. Maybe watching these shows made you succeed in life.

"Sure." I shrugged, taking my bowl and my cup and following him.

I plopped down on the sofa next to him, handing him my bowl so he could fill it up with the sugary goodness that sadly made me feel better. He turned on the TV while he shoveled little rainbows, monster heads and flames into his mouth. I stared at it while the dye started to dissolve in my bowl and colored the milk in a nasty yellowish brown color. If it weren't for the sugar high, I wouldn't be eating this.

"I was thinking of going over to see how he is doing." I told him after a few spoons full of mush. "Get the rest of my stuff."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" He asked concerned. "If you aren't ready for that no one will blame you."

I shrugged and we continued with our breakfast while Mateo was already at his job, working. I envied Nolan for being able to stay at home and and do what he really wanted to do, which was raising children and looking after their home. Mateo seemed to be content with this arrangement as well, dutifully going to work and coming home back home in the evening to Nolan excitedly waiting for his return and having prepared dinner. I had spent a lot of time watching them interact during my stay here.

"I want you to know you can stay here as long as you like." Nolan assured me, resting his head on my shoulder. "You don't have to rush things and move back in with him or break things off completely."

"Thanks." I muttered before we fell silent again.

I had already been looking into getting my own flat but the apartment market was limited and I didn't even have a job yet. I could live off my savings but I'd rather not use them up. A few jobs were available currently but most of them either paid next to nothing and I didn't want to starve or required skills and a level of education I didn't possess. The only job that I could take was working for Moros and who wanted to work for a sadistic bastard that stabbed people? Not me.

We spent the rest of our breakfast in silence, watching that weird show that was half comedy, half actually trying to sell you on items for your garden. Nolan seemed to enjoy how they were coming up with ridiculous prompts and even more ridiculous strategies to fulfill them and seemed to be greatly amused. I just found it annoying. If I wanted to buy something, I wanted to know about the product and not see if a demon could use it to model a Victorian Garden in less than an hour while also having to be tied upside down to a tree.