You're My Reason

too many ideas

A couple days ago, I was on campus, sitting, waiting, between classes. A woman came and set her bag next to me. Digging for something. I moved my things a bit, trying to give her space without seeming like I was uncomfortable with her being there. 

"I get too many ideas," she said, shaking her head, still searching through her bag.

I just smiled and laughed uncomfortably.

"I have too many ideas. I should just stop writing them down. There's just too many," she said, defeated. 

At this point, I assumed she had been looking for paper and a pen, to write her new idea down, but had given up. I don't know why she gave up. If she had forgotten her idea, or if she didn't think her idea was good enough, or maybe she just couldn't find what she needed.

I didn't think much of what happened and almost brushed it off, until later I started to think of what she said. I related to her. I always felt like I had so many ideas popping into my head, all the time. Ideas for stories, this story and many others. Many of those ideas got lost and were never built upon. Some I wrote down, saving them for another day.

Then I thought about the second thing she said, 'I have too many ideas. I should stop writing them down.'

I have to admit, lately I've gotten to the point where I immediately shut down any ideas have. It's gotten to the point where I've kind of just stopped having ideas. I don't know why exactly, but I know it's a combination of fear of failure and judgement, lack of motivation, and a few other things. I think it's easy to fall into this trap of self doubt.

But your ideas are beautiful. Your ideas are what make you, YOU. Don't stop writing them down. Your ideas are worth your time. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. 

When I say, writing down ideas, I don't necessarily mean write your ideas down. I guess in a broader sense, don't sell yourself short when it comes to your creativity. Every single one of you has at least some creativity in you and it's worth being explored. Don't let the fear of failure or judgement get to you.

I'll never know why that woman thought she had too many ideas or that she should stop writing them down, but I wish I could go back and tell her that what she said isn't true. There is no such thing as too many ideas, or too much creativity. She shouldn't stop writing them down. They're what make us unique and define us. No judgement or failure can deny your ideas of their value. Own your ideas, own your creativity. Own it all.

I'm sorry this is not an update. I just thought I'd share, since I'd been reflecting on it. 

And to the people who feel they don't have enough ideas, or creativity. I see you. I feel you. This will pass. It's easy to fall away from your creative side. It's easy to get caught up. It's normal. There is nothing wrong with you. You will get back there soon enough. 

To some of you, this will make no sense and have no affect on you, but I'm hoping that there's at least just a few who felt at least a little something from this or gained a new perspective. I feel motivated by what that woman said. And I feel motivated to do better with this book and give my ideas the justice they deserve. 

I promise to never stop writing my ideas down and I hope you do too. Cause without ideas the world would be a lot worse a place. 

Please leave a comment if you gained literally anything from this ? Or if you absolutely hated this and thought it was the stupidest mess of words, I'd sincerely love to hear that too. No matter what kind of feedback it is, I love hearing from you guys. :)