without you

chapter 1

     Cyrus Goodman. All I could see was Cyrus Goodman. Everything around me was dark. Except his face. His perfect skin shone through the darkness like a flawless flashlight. His hair perfectly flowing in the wind. Why was it windy? I didn't feel any wind. Cyrus Goodman was a gorgeous specimen who deserves to be loved back.
     Cyrus then began to lean forward, inching more and more towards my face. I couldn't concentrate on anything but the fact that Cyrus Goodman was about to kiss me. Cyrus Goodman was about to give me my first real kiss.
     Suddenly, I was jolted awake by the reality of my dad calling my name. "TJ! Get up, you're going to be late for the bus. I won't take you again."
     "Okay, dad. I'm up."
     "Good."
     Once he left my room, I climbed out of bed to get ready. I walked into the bathroom to turn on the hot water for a shower. For some reason, whenever I dream about Cyrus, I always get drenched in sweat.
     When the water warms up, I step into the shower and start on my washing routine. I begin with a dandruff shampoo treatment, then a conditioner that I leave in until I wash my body. This makes my hair feel softer when it dries.
     I step out of the shower and grab my pink towel. I have to hide this towel from my dad, because he is so not okay with me being anything but superbly masculine. I even have to wash the towel while he's at work just to make sure he never sees it.
     After drying myself off, I wrap the towel around me and look for my outfit. I find a black basketball t-shirt that Cyrus said I looked good in once. I pair the shirt with a simple pair of skinny jeans and black converse. I put on some deodorant and cologne that Cyrus has also complemented before.
     Excited about the day, I rush out of the house seconds after fixing my hair and brushing my teeth. I practically skip to the bus stop in joy.
     The special part about today is that I have finally figured out the most epic costume for Cyrus and I to wear for costume day. I have been brainstorming ideas since the principal first announced when it would be.
     I thought up of things like Cyrus being me and I would be Cyrus. I also had an idea about dressing up like tater tots and a milkshake, but I had no clue where to find those costumes on such a short notice. I started to think about costumes like peanut butter and jelly, ketchup and mustard, and salt and pepper. Suddenly, it hit me. Somersault. If you separate the words and change the spelling, you get summer and salt. It's absolutely perfect for us, since I taught him how to do a somersault.
     I lost my train of thought when the bright yellow bus pulled into the stop. I could feel that my cheeks were flushed with red. I hopped into the nasty vehicle and went straight to the back.
     It took about fifteen minutes to arrive at school. As soon as I got there, I scoured my proximity for Cyrus. He wasn't outside, so I walked into the school. I looked inside the auditorium. When he wasn't in there, I decided to check in the cafeteria.
     I walked into the cafeteria and saw him sitting with Buffy and Andi. They were laughing about something. I wasn't close enough to hear the joke, but his laugh was so adorable. He took a huge bite of the chocolate chocolate chip muffin in front of him.
     "Hey, Chocolate Chocolate Chip Muffin!" I practically yell as I walked over to him.
     "Hi, Not So Scary Basketball Guy!"
     "Oh hi... I was actually talking to the muffin. However, it's nice to see you too." I teased him lightly.
     He just giggles a bit and then takes another bite out of the delicious muffin. I usually hate how most people eat, but with Cyrus I just find everything about him cute.
     "What's up?" He says with a blinding smile.
     Before I know it, a sound comes out of me. I didn't know I could even make this come out of my mouth. The sound was a mix of a giggle, ugly laugh, snort, and screech.
     Andi and Buffy laughed, while Cyrus just looked at me. He didn't have an expression on his face, so I couldn't tell what he was thinking. I had to think of something quick.
     "So Cy, I'm going to be at the park playing basketball with some of the guys from my team after school. What are you doing during that time?"
     "Nothing."
     Buffy kicked him and I could tell that nothing meant something. He was probably supposed to go to the Spoon with the rest of the Good Hair Crew. "Don't worry about it, Cyrus. Hang with your buddies. I'll call you when I get home from the park."
     All three of them smiled at me. I don't think I've ever made Buffy smile at me before. Hopefully this won't be the last time, since I do want to date her best friend.
     "Woah there Kippen, you're getting soft." Buffy said.
     "I've always been soft. I just never let you see it. I have a tough exterior."
     "We know... She was just messing with you," says Andi with a sympathetic smile.
     Cyrus bit his lip, and I realized that there was an awkward silence between us. We never had trouble talking alone. Talking in front of Buffy and Andi was uncomfortably weird. I smirk, "So see you later Underdog."
     "Not if I see you first!" Cyrus blurts out quickly.
     I smile at him and walk away. I have to get to math class early for extra help. The funny thing about school is that I'd be quite good at it if I didn't have dyscalculia.
     I'm actually really good at science and english, when they don't involve too many numbers. Science has always fascinated me. Science continues to evolve and get bigger, so you can never know everything.
     As I walk into the math lab, I can't help but think about Cyrus. His hair, his eyes, his lips, his everything floods into my mind. I try to focus on the numbers but it's hard. Numbers have always been confusing to me, but when I think about Cyrus, I get even more confused.