Our Song

Epilogue

The winter snow fell from the clouds. Art watched as their daughter played in the snow for the first time in her life. Art was alone with her. It was just Art and Cynthia.

Paul was out on tour again to promote his new album. His first self titled solo album had done fairly well and launched Paul back into the stardom he was craving. The little voice of I can't do it, turned into I can do it. It came with a price. Paul was often away from Art and their adopted daughter just to feed the fans. It tore at Paul's heart strings.

Paul felt enormous guilt not being there for his daughter. It was like when his dad played in the orchestra; he never had time to play with Paul much because he was always busy. Paul told himself that he wouldn't do it, that he wouldn't be like his father.

Paul carried a little wallet sized photo of the two people he adored so very much on tour with him so he always felt comfort that they were somewhat there with him. He still sustained the deep seated feeling of homesickness.

Then, of course there was the shadow he had to deal with. In recent months Paul had been working to minimize the shadow's power. Most days he failed miserably letting his self lothing win. Positive thoughts were hard to dig out of Paul, and his battle with his shadow had only accentuated his consideration of who he was.

In the silent room of a hotel in Tennessee the shadow snuck into the room. The shadowy footsteps creeping up on Paul filling him with regret. Paul turned his cheek the other way and ignored the nagging.

The shadow had become much smaller as Paul shut out the nagging thoughts. Art helped with that. There was no real way of getting rid of the pest, but making the shadow as small as possible was Paul's goal. Paul wanted to demote the shadow to a small thought at the back of his head. He needed to focus on being parent, not worrying about himself.

Paul's ears perked up when he heard the ring of the telephone. He quickly brought the earpiece to his ear waiting for Art's delightful voice.

"How has Cynthia been?" Paul missed his daughter dearly, but she was in good hands.

"A little devil." Art laughed. "She got her stubborness from you." Art had her in his arms trying to coax her screaming and get her to bed.

Paul chuckled a bit wishing he could hold her in his arms and get her to sleep. He desired to see her chubby cheeks and feel the warmth of her wide toothless grin. What was once his comfort, was now the biggest road block.

"How's the shows been?" Art asked putting a bottle of milk up to Cynthia's mouth for the taking.

"Well, they really dig my new album." Paul spoke with what little pride he could muster up. Paul wasn't much of a prideful person. Loathing, and Neurotic sure, but prideful, nope.

"That's great!" Art was always optomistic, even when he missed Paul.

All Art cared about was that Paul was happy. If Paul was enjoying the solitude that came with touring Art was okay with that. Art knew they didn't always have to be together, and if Paul yearned for alone time Art gave Paul the opportunity. Art didn't want Paul to fall back into the pit of depression that had plagued him for so long. Art didn't want Paul to talk about pulling the trigger on himself. So, Art pushed aside all of the problems and focused on what Paul would want.

"I'm going to be home soon." Paul reminded Art.

"Did you hear that Cynthia? Paul's gonna be home!" Art ecstatically revealed to their three month old daughter. Cynthia grinned up at Art like she understood what he said.

***

When Paul returned home he got a kiss from Art and a cuddle with Cynthia. He got lost in the depth of her hazel eyes. The green glowing brighter than the dull brown. Cynthia babbled and wrapped her finger over Paul's.

Being with his family made Paul realize how lost he felt without them. Even being miles away from his mother and father hurt to some degree. Sacrifices had to be made to be a rock star.

"Did you get the job?" Paul asked for the forth time in the span of a week.

"I did, now I'm gonna put my mathematics degree into play!" Art smiled.

"When do you start?" Paul asked.

"Um, September 14th." Art revealed.

Art was going to become a geometry teacher at the highschool close to the apartment they rented together. It gave him something else to do when Cynthia was in day care.

Math had always been Art's comfort for many years. Math was always so practical. Even if you did a problem a million times over, right, you would always get the same answer and Art like repition like that.

"I'll be off of the road for awhile, I need to spend some time with my family." Paul hugged both of them again.

"Don't make yourself depressed." Art chewed on his thumb nail. He wished for anything but that.

"I won't, I really missed you guys. I need to find a healthy mix between family and show biz." Paul insisted.

"It's a lot different now. I never knew how much raising a family would enrich my life." Art grabbed Cynthia's blanket and covered her up.

"We'll make it through." Paul smiled.

Paul found the heathy mix he was looking for. He would go on the road for a couple of months, then return to his family. He booked studio days late at night when Cynthia and Art were fast asleep.

Paul woule always wake up to a hot pot of coffee and a note for Paul. It always said things like hope you have a wonderful day. Love you. Paul would grin and put it in a tub with all of Art's notes, love letters, and gifts.

Art juggled different jobs for awhile. He loved being a math teacher, but he longed for something else. So, he returned to recording, but kept his teaching job.

Art recorded one solo album and called it quits. It did okay, but not as well as Paul's and Art accepted that. He kept to keeping up the house and being a parent to Cynthia.

Paul had learned to accept the shadow that followed him around. The shadow would be there with his ups and especially his downs. The shadow would be with him as he got old and grey. That's just how it had to be.

***

Paul stepped onto the illuminated stage. The screams of fans filled his ears as he walked onto the stage for the last time. This was his fairwell concert. Sixty long years of touring and singing were over. Paul was ready to be with his family all the time now.

Cynthia was much older now. Paul and Art adopted two other children. They adopted a boy in 2006 and named him Beau, and adopted another daughter in 1992 and named her Lulu. Beau was the  only one left at home.

It had been a long and bumby ride for Paul and Art. They had split up a couple times, but love always pulled them back together.

Now both in their late seventies, their love was stronger then ever. The bad times were behind them, and they learned to take each other with a grain of salt.

They sat together on a park bench, quitely; holding each others hands tightly until death does it's part.

***

A/N: Oh wow I actually finished a story for once. It took a long time, but I did it. Thank you all for supporting me and this story! I appreciate all of you.