Hard To Face Reality | Complete | J.B. | BXB

Chapter 11 - Let Go

Lexi's P.O.V

As I walked down the shadowed street to the park where I knew Niall would be, I tried thinking about how I would do it. How will I break the news to him? Tell him and hope, not hope that we will be okay with it because no one can really be ok with something like this but hope he can forgive me for doing this. For hiding this from him, something that could influence his life almost as much as it's influenced mine.

The thoughts kept rolling through my head, what will I do? What will I say? Uncontrollable, it was uncontrollable, I had two choices and it hurt to choose. I don't know how he is going to feel and I don't think I know how to handle any of the feelings he might have.

Niall is strong. But he is going to make sure I'm put first and I can't let him do that.

I walked through the entrance of the park, I looked up and Niall was exactly where I had expected him to be. Right under the big tree in the centre of the park. I stopped in my tracks and took a deep breath. This is it, I have to tell him otherwise it will happen and he will never forgive me for not telling him. I closed my eyes and thought.

Zayn's P.O.V

I sat cuddling on the couch with Justin playing with his hair while watching a movie that I wasn't really paying attention to. I couldn't keep my eyes off Justin, he looked up at me and smiled. I smiled and laid a soft kiss upon his lips. I pulled away and hugged him tighter.
"Babe?" Justin mumbled.
"Yeah?" I asked beaming at him.
"I was thinking you could come back to London with me, then home, I want you to meet my family once I tell them." He asked a smile flashed across my face.
"I thought you would never ask." I said chuckling. He lent down and placed a soft kiss on my lips.
"So when are we going?" he asked.
"I don't know? But I don't know about you but Rome's getting a little boring." I said cautiously.
"I agree, why don't we go to London tomorrow?" he asked
"Yes babe that's sounds awesome!" I said smiling uncontrollably.

Later on that day Justin and I began searching for flights to London then another to Canada. Then a thought crossed my mind.
"Justin. We have never been on a date!" I said pouting a little more than needed.
"That's true." Justin said cautiously. I smiled. Grabbing Justin's hand I bent down on one knee.
"Justin-"I started but Justin cut me off.
"What are you doing, Zayn!?" Justin's face flushed a deep white colour.
"Its ok I'm not proposing." Justin sighed on relief I chuckled, and continued. "Justin Drew Bieber Will you go on date with me?" I asked.
"YES! YES! A THOUSAND TIMES YES!" Justin shouted jumping up and down acting like a girl. I laughed.

"Justiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnn" I moaned and lay down on the floor in protest with my eyes closed. When suddenly I felt a weight on top of me. My eyes fluttered open to see my beautiful boyfriend sitting on top of me with his arms crossed.
"Sooo where are we going?" Justin asked changing the subject.
"Why don't we just have a cute night in? Order room service, watch movies, go in the hot tub?" I said chuckling and lifting my brow. Justin smiled and bit his lip. He held my face in his hands and smashed my lips into his. I pulled away and Justin groaned. Rolling his figure over and getting up I felt a pang of guilt for pulling away but then realised everything we had to do before we had our date. As I walked towards the door I felt a pair of hazelnut eyes burning into my back.
"You know, those bags aren't going to pack themselves" I said grinning as I walked out the door. A sudden impulse took over me and I turned around before the door closed and stuck my head in the door. "I love you." I said without thinking and turning around hearing the door close with a final click.

Louis' P.O.V

I stared at the lid of the coffee cup that sat in front of me. I sighed as I thought about the mess that was our group. I really thought we could be that clean cut, polished boy band that everyone thought we were. But let's face it Niall's girlfriend is pregnant, Harry and I are dating, I have no idea what's happening between Liam and Justin but I assume it's serious, and Zayn's depressed because he just broke up with his fiancé. We are as stuffed as we could possibly be.

I jumped back as a hand swiped through my vision waking me from my daze. I looked up to see who the hand belonged to and smiled my Harry staring back at me smiling.

"Are you okay, Lou?" Harry asked sitting down clasping his brown coffee cup plastered with the Starbucks sign. I coughed.
"Yeah I'm okay. Better now that you're here." I said with a cheesy grin when a thought of curiosity came to mind. "How was the hair cut? Assuming you actually went this time." I asked chuckling. He pulled of his hat and posed.
"What'd ya think?" he asked I smiled and licked my lips he looked like a sex god.
"Well at least you don't look like something out of the Victorian era" I chuckled, he frowned.
"You look hot." I said leaning over the table and planting a kiss on his soft lips. Before realising the fact we were in public I pulled away, as a hurt look flashed across Harry's face. "I'm sorry." I said quietly, before mouthing the words "I love you".

Niall's P.O.V

I looked up from my hands and saw a nervous Lexi walking in through the park gates.

She took long strides towards me and my stomach dropped I could tell that something was up, this wasn't just a normal Friday night talk at the park, this was serious.

As she sat down beside me and put her head up against the tree trunk a sigh escaped her lips. I took her hand in mine.
"Babe what's up?" I said drawing circles on the palm of her hand. She looked up at me with a look that could kill. It hurt so much that I didn't want her to tell me, that whatever words that were going to fall out of her mouth could change everything. And I had the not even the slightest idea as to what she was going to say. She took a deep breath and looked me straight in the eye.
"Niall please listen to me. I have to tell you something but you can't freak out, you have to hear me out." She said with a glint of guilt in her voice. A million thoughts flashed through my head what happened??? I nodded my head slowly and licked my lips in frustration. "Niall, I-I have leukaemia." She said slowly and quietly, her voice so quiet that I only just heard what she said.

I let go of her hand and moved away shocked at the four words that had just been spoken.
"What? No! What about the babies?! C-can you still get treatment?!.... Ar-Are you going to die?" I asked shakily. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes but I kept blinking them away.
"The babies are fine Ni, they will be fine, but I'm not getting treatment Niall." She said slowly. I could hear how nervous she was about telling me.
"What, why?!" I asked scared out of my wits for her.
"I-I can't Ni, it could hurt the babies. Niall I love you too much to harm anything that you love. I couldn't bare see what you would have gone through if we lost them. I can't do that, Niall. I-I can't hurt them. I love you too much to hurt them." She spoke quietly, tears streaming down her face.

Her eyes looking down at her hands. I couldn't hold back my tears. She's going to die... The woman I love. The woman who's carrying my children, our children. She's going to leave me. No! She can't! No! NO! NO! This isn't happening! This has to be a joke! She can't die!
"I-I love you too. I love you so much." I whispered, cradling her in my arms like a fragile child. "H-How long?" I asked. I can't believe she's going to leave me. This isn't fair! I can't lose her! There has to be something they can do! Then she said the four little words that completely shattered my heart.

"A year. At most."