Chapter 14

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Dinah's POV

I still could not believe I told them what John had done to me less than a year ago. I  hadn't told them my second confession and I was worried about  how Camila would react. I figured Lauren must know after spending a lot of time with Phil and becoming so close with him since she joined the band. 

I dated Phil before I dated John which had caused a bit of tension between them after John asked me out. Sometimes I think that John only asked me out to piss off Phil because he knew how much he  still lilked me. When I dated Phil, I felt like it was more of a one sided relationship and I didn't have the same feelings for him that he did for me. When I broke up with him, he was devastated. But I was not very sympathetic because I knew how the older boy jumped from one girl to another. Although he never mistreated his girlfriends, he was a player. 

Many people have told me that he has changed, but I need to witness this myself in order to believe it. I love Phil as a friend, even though we are not very close due to the choices he had made while we were dating. Somehow I needed to tell Camila and Lauren this. However, I didn't just break up with him because the relationship felt one sided. I was afraid to tell Camila this second part because I didn't want to ruin her friendship or view on Phil. Although I hated him at one point or another, he never did anything to Camila. I want to protect her from anyone who might hurt her like John had. 

I feel like it's partly my fault that she was upset about John rejecting her from the band because I didn't try to stop her from trying out. I know how John is and I should have protected her. Even though we are the same age, I feel like she is my little sister and I always want to be there for her.

The part I'm scared about telling Camila; is the fact that Phil cheated on me. Although I didn't know about this until about a month after we broke up, it really hurt me. The two girls he cheated on me with were in other grades and had no idea he was even dating me. When they figured it out, they told me and apologized right away. He cheated once with Christie Janes the first time and with Monica Tins multiple times after her. 

I felt worthless at that point because if he really liked me, he wouldn't have cheated on me. I wish I could explain all of this to Camila without a problem, but it would be so hard. I didn't want her to resent Phil because of something that happened over a year ago. I hate when someone hates someone else just because their friend does unless it is for a good reason. 

Whether I liked it or not, he can be a completely different person now. He hasn't had a girlfriend in three months, if that shows anything. 

I would have to survive wood shop without blurting out the truth, because I wanted to tell her and Lauren at the same time in case Lauren had no idea what happened.

On my way to woodshop, I thought about how the girls had reacted when I told them about John. I wondered how they would react to my confession about previously dating Phil as well as the fact that he cheated on me. I pushed through the door and immediately saw Camila sitting at our usual table staring at me. It wasn't a stare in distance or a casual stare, though. 

She looked like she was scared out of her mind and about to freak out.

"What's wrong Camila?" I asked as I took a seat down next to her.

She picked up a ruler from the desk and tapped it on the piece of wood that layed in front of her on the table.

"I..I saw Lauren outside of the school before homeroom," she mumbled quickly.

"And? You say that like it's a bad thing. Sheesh Mila! Sometimes you really scare me," I responded.

"You don't understand. She was in the middle of a drug deal."

"No way! You must have seen it wrong. Lauren is way to smart to do drugs and waste her money and life away."

"No. I saw it. She gave this kid a large amount of cash for a green substance that resembled grass. It was definitely weed," Camila said seriously. 

"Well maybe it was her friend. There has to be a logical explanation," I tried to be as positive as possible.

"That's what I thought. But then I overheard some kids in homeroom saying she was the biggest pot head in the school and used to sell drugs last year. They also said she might start selling them again for extra money," Camila replied worried.

"Oh my god. We can't let her do that. If she gets caught she will be in so much trouble with the school and possibly the police. Plus her parents would ground her for llife!"

"Exactly. I just don't know if she will get defensive about making her own choices and having her own life," Camila responded.

"I guess. We can't just sit around and let it happen though."

"You're right. We need to talk to her about this," Camila answered.

We talked about how we would approach her about what I had seen and how we would say it. I just couldn't beleve Lauren would consider doing anything like that.

Whatever her reason was, I respected it. Although I wanted to help her stop, it was her life and choice at the end of the day.

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