Tim X Dally One-Shots!

Don't.

TW: GRAPHIC Self Harm, Suicide Attempt. Mentioned PAST abuse, mentioned PAST Rape.  Depressing Shit in general. Just TRIGGER WARNING IN GENERAL DO NOT READ IF YOU GET TRIGGERED BY SAD THINGS THANKS. This is really triggering. Even I was a little iffy about it while writing it! This is really triggering. You have been warned.

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I sits in my bed thinking over my life. I think back to when my mom would kiss my forehead and make sure I went to bed at a reasonable hour, now it's 2 in the morning and I'm still up. I think back to how my dad had taught me how to dance, but now I trip over nothing. I think back to my mom's last words to me...

"I love you... Make me proud."

Now I'm here. No job, dropped out of school, long ass criminal record, and Scars all up and down my thighs Because I was too weak for the world. Why am I here? Why do I bother living when all I've done is make everyone disappointed. I can't even bare to think about how my mom would look at me.

Tim is just dealing with me, I have so many damn nightmares he barley gets any sleep, I hyperventilate easily, I have panic attacks Al the goddamn time I'm a waste of fucking achievement. I shouldn't have been born.

My mom should have gotten that damn abortion everyone told her to have.

I'm a waste. I don't do anything helpful... Tim he's, he's perfect, and what am I?!? Some kid who can't do shit. I haven't had a job since I was 14 and that was for a fucking week before they kicked me out of it.

I get up quickly and run to the bathroom. I go to the drawer, and lift the bottom out, grabbing the blade that's laying in it. I bring it up to my wrist and make a small cut. I hiss in pain but smile after. This is the first time I have ever done it anywhere other than my thighs... I do it again, bigger this time watching the blood bead up on the surface I feel warm tears fall down my face as ai do it again, closer to the vein in my wrist this Time.

I stop before I get to it though... I don't want it to end that way. I'd rather shoot myself in the head and get it over with than Bleed out.

I walk into my bedroom, well Tim and I' bedroom, blood dripping down my arm and onto the floor. Damnit! Another thing I'm screwing up! I'm gonna ruin Tim's carpet through all of this. I walk over to the bed and pick up the pad of paper that's there. I write down the note I never thought I'd get the balls to write.

Tim... Baby... Timmy... I'm sorry. If You are reading this, I'm dead. I have killed myself. I can't do it anymore Tim. The voices never stop. The negative thoughts never stop! I can't do anything right. I disappoint you... I know I do. I'm so sorry baby... You'll forget about me soon enough, you'll find a nice Broad, or guy to hook up with, and they'll be everything you ever wanted.

They'll make you feel good unlike me. They will make you smile when they aren't even around unlike me. They'll be loved by your siblings unlike me. They won't wake up in the middle of the night screaming about shit that happened four years ago. They'll be good for you. They won't be me. I love you so goddamn much... I'm sorry...

~Dallas Winston

I finish writing and put the pad on the bed next to me, I grab the gun and mess with it for a bit. I look in the barrel of the gun and smile. I pull the saftey back and hear the click. The click that I've been waiting to hear for years now.

I let out a sob, quickly hitting my thighs loving the way the fresh cuts from earlier burn. I do it again hoping for some relief but all I get is the pain and fear of putting that gun to my head. I put the gun to my Temple and go to pull the trigger, before I can though, the door swings open and He looks up to See Tim Shepard staring back at him. I keep the Gun on my head, and he looks at me in fear. He's panicking I know he is. If I just pull the trigger right now I can make it out of this life. I'll get what I want. But I don't. He slowly walks towards me and goes to grab the gun but I move out of his way going the farthest away from him that I can.