While the boys were on tour, we didn't really have time to talk. I caught up on everything that was going on, but I was only in contact with Jimin and Namjoon. They both sent me video messages.
I felt like I couldn't find my place. I got a lot of hate, so it was hard for me to trying to deal with it. My mental health was in shambles. I felt like everything I did was wrong. I was judging myself way too much. I didn't know if I was at fault or people were just being way too hard on me. My driver drove me home, and I ran upstairs to my apartment. As I walked inside, the girls sitting in the living room gave me confused looks.
" Shouldn't you be practicing?" Jisoo asked.
" I should be, but I don't feel too well." I explained. I was about to go to my bedroom, but I froze in my place when Rosie spoke.
" Why did you sleep with our producer? " She got straight to the point. I didn't know what to say to that. I had no idea how they know about that.
" Don't believe everything you hear." I replied. As much as I wanted to deny it, I couldn't. I would've lied. I thought nobody would find out, even if I didn't do it for selfish reasons.
" Why are you doing this?" Rosie shook her head. " You get the best clothes, you always stand out, the company favors you, and when somebody would have a chance to shine a little, you take it away?"
" I didn't sleep with him to get the solo." I sighed deeply, biting my lips.
" Yeah, right." She nodded.
" If you want me to..." I sighed." I can speak to the CEO and ask him if it could be postponed."
" Wait, you're just going to give up on it like that?" Rosie asked.
" I'm tired of this." Jisoo said, stood up from the sofa.
I didn't say anything , I just ran inside my room and lay down on my bed. I hid under my blanket and Kuma ran over to me. He climbed on my belly just to lick my face.
" At least somebody still loves me." I sighed. I turned my phone on and I messaged Jimin. I wanted to tell him about everything. I knew he was probably sleeping, but I really needed someone to talk to.
After a few rings, he picked up the call. It was quite dark there. He was lying in bed next to his shirtless boyfriend. They both seemed pretty tired. Jimin was wearing glasses, which was an unusual sight. He always used to tell me that he hated them, but I thought he looked gorgeous.
" Are you guys sure that I'm not bothering?" I asked.
" It's okay," Jimin said without answering my question. " What happened?"
" Everything." I sighed. " I did something very wrong and the people at my company figured out."
" You slept with your producer?" He replied.
" God, you know about it too..." I shook my head. I was so embarassed. " Please don't hate me,"
" I don't hate you." He shook his head. " If you like him or whatever, then fine. But I'm pretty sure that there is something else going on here. He is way too old for you."
" Something is wrong nowadays." I sighed. " I feel out of place. I just want to lock myself in my room."
" Well..." Jimin looked to the side while his boyfriend was caressing his hair. " Maybe try talking to a professional?"
" Everything just turned upside down in the past few months." I said. " So, yeah. Maybe I should."
" You really fucked up this time, though." Jungkook told me.
" I know." I sighed. " I need some time off."
" Anyways, we have to go, have a good rest of your day. " Jimin said tiredly." We should sleep a little bit."
" Yeah." I nodded." Bye. "
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Good 4 U || Jennie (SEQUEL TO HAPPIER)
Fanfictieoriginally titled Friends. written in 2019. " Well, good for you. You look happy and healthy. Not me, if you ever cared to ask." If you love someone, you should accept them being happy with someone else. Even if that means that you can't be happy.