The Demon I Let Ruin Me

NINETEEN

I stare at my reflection and smile at my new look. I can't believe I dyed my hair and cut it. My hair use to be past my chest and a strawberry blonde tone. And now it's shoulder length and brown. I look so different but I love it.
I feel refreshed and full of energy now. It's been a month since everything that happened and Christmas is next week. I'm going to Harry's house for that and today I'm going shopping for them.
I have to go to my moms for Christmas Eve so I plan on buying them stuff too. My mom will be easy, a new dress or a pair of heels. And for Daniel and his wife, I'll buy them for their baby. I don't know the gender because they want it to be a secret so I'll just buy a gender neutral toy.
They have no idea what I've been through in the past month although Daniel called and asked me I didn't come to thanksgiving but I just told him I had work. Other than that they haven't made any contact with me which is fine because I don't want them to know.

I finish putting my makeup on and head out the door, pulling my winter coat on.
I know I have to get Harry the best gift I can grab. He deserves so much and I want to give him everything I can. I'm so close to being back to myself again, I can feel it.

When I get to the mall, there are a ton of people and I'm not excited to be here anymore. The crowds are too big to be able to sit with my own thoughts as I guess what to get everyone.
After I walk out of a kitchen store with a 3 pack of cookie sheets for my mom and a a box of cookie cutters, I turn to go to a different store.

"McKayla?" A voice that I recognize but don't remember that well calls me and I turn to see who it is. My ex boyfriend Liam stands in front of me. I haven't seen him since after high school. We agreed not to continue dating because he was going to California for school and I was staying in Michigan. I didn't expect to see him. The break up between us was so grown up. We spoke about how we felt and where we saw ourselves after college and our answers were too different. We agreed to keep in touch but after graduation I never saw him again. I wish that's how Edward and I-no, I'm moving on from that. Comparing breakups is not the way to do that.

"Liam?" I question. He pulls me in for a hug and we exchange hi's as we pull away. He looks happy to see me and I feel the same. "I haven't seen you since high school. How have you been?"

"Great. And you?" He asks.

"Fine. Better than I've been for a while actually. What brings you to Michigan?" I ask, pushing my hair behind my ear with my free hand.

"Visiting my parents. I've done it every year, I can't believe I haven't run into you yet."

"I'm not really a mall type of person. I usually do my shopping online but I thought this would be a good change in pace." I explain.

"I'm actually planning on coming back here after I graduate. My father knows a guy who can get me in where he works."

"That's amazing. Congratulations." I beam.

"How's the love life? Got anything going on?" I expect my heart to break at the question but it doesn't.

"Nope. You?"

"No actually....hey I'd love to catch up over dinner? Tonight?" He offers and I feel butterflies at the idea of going on a date with anyone besides Harry but I suppose it'd be a nice time just catch up.

"Yes. I'll give you my number." I pull out a piece of paper and pen and write my number down and hand it to him. "See you tonight." I tell him and he walks away, looking at the paper. I don't know if this is a date or not. I think it's just two old friends agreeing to spend time together. Besides, he lives across the country. Dating wouldn't make anymore sense now than it did then.
I agreed to date Harry when I was okay again. Bedsides, I love Harry and my feelings for him don't compare to how I feel to anyone.