It's all because of you

Just don't leave, Don't leave

"I’m not living
I’m just killing time
Your tiny hands
Your crazy kitten smile"

The song for this chapter is "True Love Waits" by Radiohead (the version from A Moon Shaped Pool album)

-Him-

“No.” His voice cracked around the word from emotion as well as disuse.

Deep down he knew something was terribly wrong with her. He didn’t want to acknowledge the guilt he had for not being there to protect her. Not that he had any right to, he gave up his claim on her when he broke it off. But he’s always believed in fantastical mythical things, and he fully believed that she was sending him a message. That amber necklace had worked once, in a forest near Istanbul, and he knew it would work again. To bring the lovers together. To help him find her.

He ran the rest of the way to his camp and packed his shit even though it was dusk and the trek down the mountain would take hours. Stubbornness and stupidity had led him away from her, but he wouldn’t let it keep him there. Finally, at nearly midnight in a strange village in Bulgaria, he found a man that would sell him a truck on short notice. He was starving, deliriously tired, and pretty sure his vehicle was a death trap, but he was on his way to her.

Only a few hours in he had to cave to basic necessities and stop at a gas station. He blindly grabbed something to eat and a black coffee, plonking money on the counter and leaving. He had more important things to worry about than overspending at a convenience store.

He was in line at the border crossing into Turkey before he even contemplated what the situation at home might be. Did anyone else know if she was hurt? Or was she lost? Kidnapped? It had been about 10 hours since he saw her up on that mountain. Thinking about her being afraid or in pain for that amount of time was pure agony. His brain was spiraling and his hands shook on the wheel of the old battered truck.

Part of him wanted to be the one to swoop in and save the day. He wanted to take her in his arms and kiss her, help her heal from whatever had happened to her. It was selfish, he knew, but those were the thoughts that fueled him. If he thought about the list of terrible scenarios running in the back of his mind, he would actually go crazy.

As dawn approached and he got closer to Istanbul, closer to her, he felt solace in the fact that he could feel, like physically feel, her presence growing stronger. The connection they had, transmitted through the amber necklace he gave her, hadn’t broken or weakened. It was pulling him to where she was.