Lucas, My Love

Chapter Nineteen

Liv's POV

I lay on the blanket snuggled up to Luke as we bask in the stars.
He leaves in the morning, and I'm not ready to let him go.
We haven't said much since we got out of the city and found a place to lie down-- neither of us want to confront the topic at hand.

"I have something for you in my room that I've been working on." Luke admitted in a small voice, his breath warming my hairline. "It's not finished though."

"I don't think I'd want it to be finished." I said quietly to myself.

Luke's arm tightened around me as he grew emotionally weak. We both agreed that tonight wouldn't be sad, but we both had crossed our fingers.

He took a deep breath. "Anyway, I was going to give it to you tonight, but I left it on my desk."

"I want to see it before you leave, not after, okay?" I looked at him with big eyes, silently asking him to promise me the closure.

"Okay."

I sighed into his neck, and he kissed my forehead. Silence ran it's course again.

"What are you thinking about?" Luke traced shapes in the palm of my hand.

"Did you know that the brightest objects in the universe are just matter spiraling into a black hole?" I could feel him watching me, but I didn't dare look at him.

He kissed my cheek and lingered there-- his lips comfortably resting on my face as his nose tickled the space next to my eye.

"London is only three hours ahead; we can still talk every day." He assured me.

I paused. "I know, but..."

"Yeah, I'll miss this too."

My throat felt tight, and the tip of my nose stung. "I'm sorry." I apologized for no reason yet every reason.

"Amelia, it's okay. I forgive you. I will always forgive you." That's the only answer I could ever wish to hear.

I found out that Jess and Luke had talked, and Jess had slipped about our conversation that day in the car-- the one about us taking a break. I've just been heavy with guilt since then.

"We're going to be fine." I muttered hopefully.

Then Luke started laughing, and I couldn't help but smile even though I didn't understand. "Do you remember that time when we went to the zoo, and that bird chased you around?"

I remembered vividly. I joined in on the laughter. "That was terrible; it landed in my hair!"

"And then I tried to help by pushing it off, but it started pecking at me and dug deeper into your scalp." Luke was giggling like a cute little boy, and I was laughing more at his enthusiasm than the wretched memory.

"Okay, but what about when you were at my house, and we were watching a movie with my parents and you fell asleep and my dad poured ice down your shirt?" I had almost cried of laughter that day.

"I was so embarrassed and so cold." We both smiled nostalgically.

"I'll see the boys before you leave tomorrow, right?" They had become some of my best friends since I started dating Luke. Though I'm not sure Calum ever completely got me.
Luke told me they had to talk but that they cleared things up.

"Yeah, they'll probably be at my house, but if you don't see them there, you'll definitely see them at the airport."

"Okay." I thought for a moment, debating whether I actually wanted to say what I was about to say. "Uhm, the night that Luke and I broke up he told me that we are just teenagers; that we don't know what love is. But, and I know it's only been a few months, but I love you in a way that makes me question if I've ever really love anything before. Lucas, I've only ever loved you. It's always only ever been you." I sounded conflicted and pained, but I was telling myself this for the first time too.