Harley Quinn And The Joker

'How Ya Drinkin'?'

Even for his standards this was insane. How did he do that, and, more important, how did he survive such a major injury...and how did he get back to life?

"Caboom!" Black Seven's surprised call brought my thoughts back and I tried not to focus on Joker's face as he stepped closer to Black Seven who remained motionless.

Joker widened his eyes at the sight of Black Seven, who I guessed was nervous - because the way Joker looked like was simply eerie, if not horrifying - even to me.

"Get. Away!" I warned Black Seven one more time but he just stayed where he was as Joker stopped a view feet away from him and played with a knife in his left hand.

"What's that supposed to be, Blacky?" He giggled and my heart skipped a beat. 'He knows!?' How did he find out? It couldn't have been the scar on Black Seven's face since I also used to have multiple injuries on my own.

Black Seven tilted his head and, surprisingly, didn't sound nervous or scared at all. "You know I'm not him?" It did sound like he was suppressing some kind of emotion, but I couldn't focus on that. I needed to get him away before Joker would kill him!

"What, you thought I wouldn't notice?" A deep, crazy laughter rose from Joker's throat and he pointed the knife at Black Seven's head. "You're like half an inch smaller than him. Although I have to admit your acting skills are, as you'd possibly say, dang."

I was actually confused. As much as I wanted to scream of frustration that this lunatic was back, threatening my city and its citizens, I also wondered why Black Seven remained so calm.

"Okay, excuse me for a sec." Black Seven turned away after the Joker nodded and started...laughing?

"How awe-some is dat freakin' day?!" He started jumping around and punched the car he landed on earlier multiple times before he was able to calm down and looked at Joker with, as I figured, a big smile. "Sorry, had to keep them feels down for a while."

He walked back to the exact same spot he stood at before and pointed at Joker's face. "What happened ta yer cheeks, dude? Looks like my grandma afta I set 'er face on fire, heh!" He really found that funny.

Now I was almost totally sure that Joker would kill Black Seven for that comment within the next seconds. But nothing actually happened. Except for the crazed man laughing.

"Like your humor, kid. If you want to know, a tiny little explosion ripped off part of my lips and cheeks." Joker giggled and ran his tongue over his exposed teeth. Fresh blood was dropping down his face as some of the multiple scars on his face and neck started bleeding.

Black Seven sounded curious as he asked: "Seriously, dude. How ya even drinkin'? Ain't the liquids just floatin' outta yer mouth without cheeks?" The sensors in the mask of his told me that he was actually smiling in amazement and widened his eyes.

"Well." Joker started and obviously had trouble pronouncing certain letters, such as m and p. "It does, that's why I use pieces of leather when I fill my mouth with water or something."

Black Seven laughed crazily and jumped from one foot to the other. "Joker, seriously, ya should leave yer face like that, looks like you're smilin'!"

He was right. The skin and muscles were missing to the point where Joker's cheekbones were, giving his face a devilish, yet happy look. But I simply couldn't understand what Black Seven was going for.

"Same to you, scarface." I couldn't tell if Joker was being friendly or just waiting for an opportunity to slit Black Seven's throat.

"Thanks, I'm prouda that one. Got it while helpin' some birds, y'know." Black Seven ran two of his fingers over his scar and stared right into Joker's eyes. "Now what ya want?"

Getting a second knife from his right sleeve, Joker giggled. "Your head mounted on my wall. If you allow."

Black Seven bit his lip and made a hissing sound. "Ay, bad decision." He tilted his head again and pointed down the street. "How 'bout a lil sightseeing instead? I hear Gotham's famous for its chocolate syrup."

"Run away as long as you still can!" I tried one last time to get Black Seven out of this but he didn't respond to it the way I wanted him to. "Shut it, B-Man." He said and I shook my head, already feeling like I would have to burry another person by the end of the day.

Joker stepped closer but all Black Seven did was rising a finger. "Hold on for a moment." He sounded like he wasn't realizing what was happening and I started to grab my chair tighter. I didn't want to see how he got stabbed.

"What is it?" Joker calmly asked and stopped as Black Seven sat down on the car behind him. "I know ya can kill me 'n' yer fightin' skills are betta than mine. If ya wanna kill me, ya will." He played with a batarang and looked down at it. "But instead o' injuring us by knifes an' teeth an' bat-o-rangs..." 'What the hell is he doing?' I wondered and looked at Robin in confusion who also had no clue.

Black Seven continued after he scratched a smiley face on the car. "I see this day has been a little rough on you. So how 'bout a fight that will actually be a whole lota funnier than punchin' our bones out."

Joker put his knifes down and tilted his head. "I'm listening, Blacky." He actually looked like he was interested in Black Seven's proposal but how would I know? I'm not insane.

Black Seven tilted his head and looked at Joker with a curious face. "Whatcha sayin' bout a dance fight?"

"He's dead. He's so dead." Robin muttered and even I had to facepalm in confusion and some other emotions not worth explaining. "I knew he was crazy but he's total nuts!" How could he possibly think Joker was someone who could be reasoned with?

Joker pulled his hand up and I already prepared for the sound of breaking bone. "That...actually...does sound like fun." He ran his hand through his hairs and my jaw dropped. For the first time I can remember.

"Did...did he just get the Joker to agree about a compromise?" Damian asked with big eyes. "Am I dead? Did i get drugged?"

I shook my head. "No. Because I'm seeing that, too." Maybe Black Seven was one of the people who were crazy but in a good way. Maybe he could help me more with handling Joker than I thought.

Black Seven rubbed his hands together and smiled. "Great. Now lemme take a sec ta find the button that plays music." I rose an eyebrow. The batsuit didn't possess this function but Black Seven actually pushed a button on his left forearm and there was suddenly some song playing. 'When did he fix that up?'

"That's what you kids listen to these days?" Joker rolled his eyes. "Hey, you want me to play some 1950s songs, old man?" Black Seven hissed and I winced. He handled the Joker as if he was talking to his own child.

"God, no!" Joker put the knifes back up his sleeves and stepped back before Black Seven took off the mask and stared right into the tiny cameras with his insane smile. "Sorry, but I have a lil stagefright, so if y'all 'scuse me." He slammed the mask on the ground and something made a cracking cound before the systems broke and I lost total contact to him.

"Damn it!" I sighed and leaned back in my chair, trying not to nervously stare at the black screen.

"I bet you a week cleaning the entire batcaves that he will return with at least three broken ribs." Damian mumbled and I took a deep breath. "I wish I could trust Black Seven with keeping the Joker under control. But I fear you're right."

Not that I thought Black Seven's idea was dumb. It was actually smart because it'd distracted Joker or at least give Black Seven the chance to actually talk to this man. But Joker doesn't play by other peoples rules. He uses them and manipulates them. All I could do now was to wait. Because I certainly didn't want to send Robin out all by himself.