The Flaws of being a Hiccup take III

Chapter 8: Thinking

Astrid

I breathe in heavily, holding it in as I turn my head around, examining the empty room. I look out to the window as a small breeze brushes passed me, blowing my bangs out of my eyes. I hug the small baby blue blanket in my arms tightly, never letting go. I trace the small pattern that I had sewn onto it by Gobber the day after he left, in hope that I would be holding him in it once more. It read Stoick, I smile at the small and simple words, but realise there's nothing to be happy about. My head droops slightly looking down at the wooden bare floorboards. They creak on under my weight as I sway from side to side.

I bring the baby blanket up to my soft lips, kissing it tenderly, keeping it there on my lips for a few seconds before pulling it back up to my chest again. A tear slips down my cheek as I let it fall, what's the point in wiping it away if more are likely to follow.

I hear a heavy sigh behind me, I swiftly wipe away my tear before turning round to face the culprit. I smile fakely as my gaze meets his emerald green eyes, his eyes so alone and lost.

"hi Hiccup!" I try to say as enthusiastically as I can, but fail. He leans on the wooden frame of the door, arms crossed his elbow against it.

"I thought you might be here..." he says, seeing right through to how I'm really feeling, like he always knows. He stands upright, moving toward me slowly and cautiously, wandering if it's the right move to make.

I frown slightly, trying to force a smile, or something to escape my lips, but nothing does. I just turn back, walking to the centre of the dark and dusty room, still untouched after all these years. Time has just flew by. It feels just like yesterday that I was holding little Stoick safely in my arms, I stroked his cheek lovingly. But then he was snatched right from me, gone forever.

The amount of blame Hiccup threw at himself for not getting there sooner, for not seeing it coming or fighting back, doing anything to get our baby back into the safety of our arms, and I let him.

My gaze shifts back to his unused cradle, from which he had been snatched from just 5 years ago. Five years...

I had to remember that Stoick was no longer a baby anymore though, hey had passed that. I had missed his first word, his first step, his first laugh, his kisses, hugs. He would have probably been training with the other tots today, but he wasnt. For all I knew my perfect little bundle of joy could be dead, buried somewhere in a deep forest or strewn into the ocean, still trying to find his way home, his way back to me. But how could somebody just kill a baby like that, something so fragile, so innocent.

I tug at his blanket again, which  hadn't noticed I'd been trying to rip apart for the last ten minutes. The thoughts of my lodt baby in my mind. But maybe he was still alive? But was he being loved? Was he having the life that he was supposed to live here with me? I could only hope and pray with all that I had left that he was still, still waiting for me to find him, somewhere out there. But it just wasn't possible...

tears gently strolled down my cheeks, I didn't try to hide or conceal them though I just let them fall, I didn't have the strength to wipe them away. Everything I loved had been torn away from me...

A soft hand caresses my cheek, the smell of Toothless' saliva and a coal like smell from the forge. He spoke no words lifting my chin up to meet his gaze. Big bags hidden under his beautiful eyes. I lifted my hand up, making contact with hist cheek too. My fingers tracing the scar on his chin from when his mother was taken from him. I had never given a thought of how he had felt, how could I have been so selfish? I was surprised that he hadn't left me after all these years, being the stubborn viking I am.

"you ready?" he says slowly waiting for my reaction. My mouth parts to speak but nothing comes out. I shake my head, I'm not ready... so many things trigger so many memories, Hiccups eyes remind me of Stoicks, his scar reminds me of Stoicks birthmark, the academy reminds me of what he'll never have. "hey, everything's going to be ok, it's time..." I nod this time, wiping away a tear which I was struggling to keep back.

I put Stoicks blanket into his small cradle as Hiccup puts his arm around my shoulders, guiding me out of the room for the last time. "goodbye Stoick..." I whisper, blowing a kiss towards the cot and closing the door. I sigh heavily.

"let's go..." he says, gripping my hand tightly and leading me to what would meet us at the docks.

HEY GUYS! WELL HERE IT IS! I THINK I DID REALLY BAD IN MY MATHS TEST, PH WELL I'LL JUST HAVE TO RESIT...

I HOPE THAT THIS WAS OK! IT FELT KIND OF RUSHED! SORRY...

I WILL TRY TO UPDATE TOMORROW! WAS IT GOOD?

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