All Over Again (Sequel to Wanted Man)

Chapter Twenty-Four

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

“Please… no…!”

McKenna's eyes snapped open at the low moan rising from the far side of the bed. It was raw and hoarse, and the sheer agony in it made her blood run cold.

Loki thrashed around, twisting in the covers that wrapped about his waist. His legs kicked free and he panted as if he’d run a marathon in his sleep. As McKenna sat up and peered down at him, his face twisted as if in agony and he begged, “I cannot… don’t do this… no…”

“Loki!” She caught him by his right arm. “Loki, wake up.”

“NO!” He sat up, his left arm arcing toward her, his fist clenched.

“Loki!” She ducked, swinging to her right and just narrowly escaping being punched in the jaw by her husband.

His fist buried in her pillow and his eyes opened, wild and unfocused at first, and his right hand came up to grab her by the throat instead. She gurgled as he squeezed and closed off her airway, terror seizing her just as tightly, and her, “Loki,” came out as a strangled wheeze.

But it was enough. His hand opened, his eyes no longer wild but filled with fear as he jerked away from her. “McKenna… oh bloody Hel…”

He reached for her and she stiffened as he pulled her into his arms. “Oh, love,” he whispered, his voice breaking, “I’m sorry... I’m sorry... I’m sorry....”

As he whispered to her, he buried his face in the slope of her neck and she realized he was trembling. Sliding her arms about his waist, her hands flat against his back, she hugged him, murmuring, “It’s okay, Loki. It was only a dream, sweetheart. Only a dream.”

“I’m sorry.”

She squeezed her eyes shut at the naked pain in his voice and tightened her hold on him, rubbing his back gently. “I know, Loki. I know.”

“I would never hurt you, darling girl,” he murmured into her neck. “Not ever.”

“I know.”

“I love you, McKenna.”

“I know.” The curve of her neck grew damp, which made her pull him even closer. “I love you, too, Loki. And it’s okay. It was just a dream.”

He went quiet, never loosening his hold on her, but tightening his arms about her. She kept rubbing his back gently, then reached up to smooth a hand over his hair, as she did to Selig when he awoke from a bad dream.

Finally, he pulled away and gazed down at her, his eyes red and watery. He caught her by the face, his fingers gentle against her cheeks as he whispered, “I am sorry.”

“I know you are.” She held his gaze and managed to smile. “You don’t have to keep apologizing. I know you’re sorry and I know it wasn’t intentional. What were you dreaming about?”

He slowly untangled from her and sank back into the pillows. “When I fell from here.” He reached up and rubbed his face with both hands. “I chose to let go of that staff, McKenna. I brought it all on myself.”

She shifted to face him and let her hand come to rest on his chest. “You let go?”

He nodded. “I tried so hard to prove to the Allfather I was as worthy a son as Thor and I failed. And to punish them, I let go.”

She pressed her lips together and swallowed hard. “You tried to kill yourself?”

His hands fell away from his face. “I did.”