Insanity || Ongoing

8. Shady af texts

<Elise p.o.v>

Calculus and history fly by inexplicably slow, with me continuously anticipating lunch. When the bell rings signifying lunch I start towards the hallway and see Zehraya standing in a corner waiting.

"Told you I'd find you." Her voice is deep but continuous and smooth. She grins. In the rush of the hallways, she grabs my hand and takes me to the lunch hall. We take a seat next to the entrance from where we can see the entire hall. I got a tuna sub.

"So, do you know Kai?" I question casually. He seems really interesting to me. One second he's avoiding me and the next, he tells me to sit with him in lunch.

"If you mean the all dark, tanned, green eyes, messy black haired Kai then yes, and you," she says pointing at me," should stay away." Her tone changes from airy and nonchalant to serious.

Right when she says that I see Kai enter and lock eyes with me. I wave him over to us.

"Who are you call-" Zehr asks turning around, "Shit."

"What? What's wrong?" I enquire, confused.

"Nothing, absolutely nothing." It doesn't seem like 'nothing'.

"Uh, hey Elise. Are you sure you're okay with me sitting here?" His voice lowers with every syllable, laced with doubt.

"Yeah! Come on, don't be stupid!" I respond shakily, this sure as hell is awkward. He sits down opposite to me and tries to smile, but it comes of as a grimace.

"Hey, Zehraya, right?"

"Yes, and you are Kai."

"Mhm."

"I need to use the washrooms," I mutter and leave before any one of them can oppose.

---
<Kai pov >

I want a friend. I don't understand how or why, but I want Elise, and if that means befriending Zehraya, I'll do that. Zehraya and I, we have history. She has a big mouth and went on picking a fight with me in the library, and I had to make sure she stayed away, so I called her things I would never call anyone in the heat of the moment. She didn't understand I did it for her. I don't want anyone near me because they'll get to know who I am and fear me and I don't even know what I'm capable of.

"Zehraya, I- I am sorry for that day. I really hope you know that I didn't mean a word I said, and I wish I could explain but I can't. I just- I'm sorry."

She listens to every word, scorching my eyes with her hard gaze.

"I'll forgive you, but answer two questions honestly."

I don't know what to do. I can't answer questions about me because I don't know most answers myself, but I can try.

"Okay..."

"This is going to be fun. First question, why do you even want to sit here? Why are you nice to Elise?. The second question, you said you can't explain why you called me those things, but I want an explanation."

She might as well ask me to buy her the moon because both of these questions I can't answer because I- it scares me. I resist the urge to point out that her first question is actually 2 but there's no point.

"I am nice to Elise and I want to sit here because I've spent too long pushing people away. I've spent too long wandering these halls alone and pitying myself. I-I want hope, and Elise is like- like a living reincarnation of hope."

"And I called you those names because I didn't want attention, I have stayed invisible and I wanted to keep it that way and getting into fights, issues and relationship opposed all of that. I have spent too much time and effort isolating myself and I couldn't let that all go." My voice cracks twice. I hate pouring out my emotions to others. It's like letting one of my walls down and though I have enough walls, one wall reveals too much.