Devil Meets Bitch

chapter 1 - Im a lawson and imma crazy bitch

Beep...Beep...Beep
Oh my lord....what's that annoying sound now
Stupid that's your alarm
Since when did I have an alarm clock
Oh bitch, get the fuck up
Nah, I think you're lying, shut up and let me sleep in peace
Beep...Beep...Beep
Hiiiiiiiiyahhhhhhhh...be gone, you agent of the devil
Oh you just destroyed our 6th alarm clock this month
Huh......oh my God ....I think I'm supposed to be awake
Nuh-uh bitch....you should really sleep your entire existence away
I open my eyes and look around ....yhup, I'm definitely still sleepy.....hi world....I think I'm going crazy
Bitch....the doctors said that the moment you were popped out
Shut up inner voice...I'm trying to wake up here
OK, you can do this.. Just move your leg to the side a bit ...and put it on the floor
Somehow...I mistook my head for my leg and end up falling in a very weird and uncomfortable position with my head on the floor and my lower body still hanging on the bed
*face palm* bitch , why are we the same person, I'm much more smarter than you are
Shut up stupid....I am you and you are me
Sadly
OK time to get up.. I try raising my head back up but guess what, like the stupid person I am , somehow I end up unhooking my legs from the bed and this makes me roll over my head in a very weird position now lying flat on the floor...trust me...most of the things I do, I don't understand
Ohhh....sorry... You see bitches my name is AQUEELA LAWSON ...I'm 22 years old....I live on my own..... I hate physical contact but when it comes to beating people up, leave that action for angry AQUEELA....I can't help but feel I'm forgetting something
Oh you mean the job interview you're supposed to have at 9:30am this morning at the Rodriguez enterprise??! My subconscious said
Oh shu.....holy mother of all crazies..... My interview....that was what I was forgetting..
I stood up immediately, checked the time on my stupid device box (it used to be a phone) and its 8:59 am already.... With a shriek louder than that of a dying cat, I rushed into my bathroom, brushed like a mad woman on a crazy race...not that I'm not.....jumps into the shower and washed myself off, I wrapped myself in a towel and applied lotion to my body....well, I'm pretty short, about 5'8 , my body was nothing to gush about...I had all the right junks in all the right places but it never really freaked me like it does to most girls..... I dress in a black  fitting three-quarter pencil skirt and a black shirt which I tucked in...and paired it with a black converse....yeah yeah....my favourite colour is black and I seriously hate heels, don't get me wrong, my sister buys me those death traps but the moment I get them, I just shove them under my bed like a pro and carry on with my beautiful converse
Bitch don't you think you've done enough introduction and maybe it time you get you stupid ass to the interview cos I'm tired of not having enough food
Oh yeah, the interview
I run out of my apartment locking it behind me....you see the importance of my beautiful shoes
Get into my beat up vehicle and drive to the Rodriguez building...it was right in the heart of new York ...as I parked my beat up golf 3, I got a lot of weird looks from people...but hey, do I give a flying fuck....hell no....I parked my bitch named psycho....yeah, I named my car psycho because when I got her and I was taking her for a ride, I accidentally hit her against my mailbox even though I  was quite sure I changed the gear ....so I really believed the car was psycho and there goes my lame story....yeah.yeah, I know....I'm amazing...I make my way into the building with just 5 minutes to spare ...I ran into the building like a fucking retard
..again, thanks to my amazing shoes...and when I got to the front desk, I met a young Lady ....not older than 26 judging by her looks but daym did she look like anabelle....you know the scary one ...no seriously, the amount of make up on her face could make anyone cringe...with the look I was giving her, I wasn't surprised when she glared at me ...but me being the nice bitch I am, I just said.., well hello to you scary looking Lady, I'm here for a job interview and if you will pretty please direct me to where the interviews are being held.....she scowled at me at the nickname and suddenly smirked....have you ever seen the face of a constipated animal...well, that's your description......she told me to go to the 66th floor ....I gave her a mock salute and dashed to the elevators quickly hitting the 66th floor button
Guess what people, the elevator came to a stop at the 66th floor and I stepped out but what I saw made me hate Anabelle the more....she fucking sent me to the boiling room..that bitch...just let me catch her, I'll break her into pieces.....little did I know I had an audience....I heard a chuckle resonate from.the shadows and I jerked my head in the direction
"What are you doing here chica"
"Ohhh, I came to get lunch....I'm fucking lost dammit"
He looked amused then said "sarcasm I see"
"If you will please help me cut this conversation and tell me where interviews are being held I'll be more than grateful"
He laughed and said "I see you complained about Kandy's looks then"
Oh so that's Anabelle's name
Nah.....I think Anabelle fits her better
"Who wouldn't, she looks like the living version of sister Ursula ...the ghost version... In " the nun" "
He laughed at my reply again and said " you know you're like an hour late for the interview already right"?
I checked my device box and guess what people, it was fucking 10:25 am  already....I was soo fucked
"By the way, you're heading for the 56th floor" Mr.stranger said to me
I muttered a quick thank you and rushed back into the elevator praying for the ride to be faster as is it had a mind in its own....I started muttering different prayers and promises to God
Well, I finally got to my destination but when I stepped out, I couldn't help but let out a string of cuss words... Why you ask , well considering the fact that the place was void of people ....I walked to the front desk and saw another Anabelle , I couldn't help but groan out loud as I walked towards the second ugly doll...what pissed me off the most was her shirt looked like a 5 year old's ....no doubt she borrowed it from a little girl
She sneered at me and said " listen here ugly, firstly, all interviews are over for today, secondly, no I didn't borrow this shirt from a little girl you stupid dumbass bitch"
"Oh, I said that out loud"
I was about to get on my knees and beg to let me do the interview when my ming reeled back to what she said *bitch*
"Wait a minute Anabelle 2, did you call me a bitch"
  " yes I did dumbass now scoot along....there's no job for you here"
"Hey stupid, you don't get to decide that" I said while my eyes darted to the door few feet behind her that read in bold cursive letters MR RODRIGUEZ
Hmmmm...I guess he's the boss
No bitch, he's just the janitor with the tag....and whatever you're planning to do, I totally disagree because I don't trust the foolish mind of yours now please just leave you like a respectable human....not that you are though
Oh shut up.... I won't do anything too stupid
All the while Anabelle 2 just kept looking at me like I was a retard who belonged in an asylum.... Well retard,  yes I am,  but that asylum part was highly offensive