I'm Mariana Gilbert. (TVD fanfic: Damon Salvatore)

From Where I Lay

I looked into Elena's room as she put her earrings in, staring in the mirror at the black dress that she was wearing . "Hey." I stated quietly and watched her turn to me and nod.

"I'm almost ready." She stated and I shrugged, walking over to her.

"Take your time." I replied with a small smile and she slowly nodded, looking away from me. "I—Uh, I wanted to tell you something that I think you should know." I stated, smoothing down the dress I wore nervously and Elena looked at me from the mirror reflection. "I was willing to give up my life to save you—But John stopped me." I informed and watched her brows furrow before she looked at the unopened letter and Gilbert ring from where they sat on her dresser. "I know that John was a really terrible person, that I could say I generally disliked—But at the end of the day, you were the one thing he loved and cared for.. No matter what." I pointed out quietly and Elena's eyes glazed over.

"Thank you, Mariana." Elena whispered with a small nod and I gave her a small smile.

"I'm gonna go finish getting ready." I replied before walking back to my room. I walked over to my bed and sat on it as I put on my high heels before I got up and walked over to my dresser to fix a few curls that were getting in my face. I felt my gaze drift over to the letter that sat on the corner of my dresser also before I grabbed it hesitantly. I stared down at it in uncertainty but took a deep breath before I opened it and started reading.

'Mariana..
        It's no easy task being an ordinary parent to an ordinary child. I failed in that task. And because of my prejudices, I failed Elena. I'm haunted by how things might have played out differently if I had just heard her side of things.. For me, it's the end. For her, a chance to grow old and someday do better with her own child than I did with mine. And for you, Mariana, I do not ask for your forgiveness, or for you to forget. But I ask for you to believe this.. whether you are reading this as a human or a vampire, I love you and Elena all the same. As I've always loved you and always will. So I thank you, Mariana. For making me realize that love should not have such boundaries or barriers. Thank you for showing me that no matter who leaves Elena's life, you—her sister, never will. One day, the love and protection you feel for Elena and Jeremy, will be for a child. A child that you will want to protect from all of the evil things that you have now been accustomed to. A child that will be shown the love and compassion from their mother, that you were not able to be shown with your own.. I promise you, Mariana.. your compassion, is a gift to all who have come across it. Never lose it.
                                         Always,
                                                    John.'
~~~~

We walked through the cemetery slowly before we all stopped in front of the Gilbert family plots. Elena handed me two of the three roses she held in her hand before she stepped forward and placed the one remaining rose, onto John's grave. I looked beside the grave over to our parents' and I felt my eyes glaze over slightly. I walked over to them before I placed the other two roses on the ground in front of the headstones. I looked over at Jeremy who stood silently beside Jenna and Alaric, looking over the three graves quietly. "Then there was four." Jeremy stated quietly and I scoffed lightly, nodding in agreement at Elena, Jeremy, Jenna and I.

"They're still here." I replied with a small nod as I looked over the graves slowly.

"Where, Mariana?" Jenna asked in defeat and I looked at her as her eyes glazed over also. "There is already so much that I am trying to wrap my head around. This—this is just too much." She added in defeat and I slowly nodded in agreement.

"It's never going to get easier." I pointed out and she furrowed her eyebrows at me as I looked over Stefan, Alaric, Bonnie, Caroline and Damon who all stared back at me from where they stood. "If anything, we take the losses and pray to god that we can take a few more." I added, looking back at Elena and Jeremy. "It's never going to be the way things used to be. But we make it bearable—One day at a time." I stated and Jeremy looked down quietly while Elena slowly nodded in agreement with me. I looked back at Damon who slowly walked away from the crowd and I followed after him. "Caroline told me what you did." I stated, stopping him in his tracks as he put his hands in his pockets. "About how you saved her and Tyler from being apart of Klaus' sacrifice." I added, tilting my head at him as he turned to me and I noticed how pale he had gotten.. How exhausted he looked.