Random jokes quotes and weirdness

England

There was once a Scotsman, and Englishman and a woman sitting together in a carriage in a train going through Wales. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style train, there was no lights in the carriages and so it went completely dark. There was this kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. When the train came out of the tunnel, the woman and the Scotsman were sitting as if nothing happened and the Englishman had his hand against his face as he'd been slapped.

The Englishman was thinking: 'The Scottish fella must have kissed the woman and she missed him and slapped me instead'

The woman was thinking: The Englishman must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Scotsman and got slapped instead.

The Scottish man was thinking: 'This is great. The next time the train goes through the tunnel I'll make a kissing noise and slap the English ba**rd in the face'