Chapter 13: Secret Lovers

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I've gone through several emotional changes in the last week and was now at another. I was afraid. I was afraid that Elias was changing. I spend my days waiting for him to do or say something stupid, misogynist or offensive just to have a reason to turn heel on him; right now I was a tweener in danger of a face turn.

I wanted to hate him, I wanted to be repulsed by him, I wanted to feel uncomfortable whenever he was around, I wanted to feel violated every time he penetrated me but I couldn't. That's what bothered me the most about our situation. It was so much easier to despise him. My hatred for him was my focus and now I was lost.

I stared up into his eyes as he hovered over me, thrusting. I desperately looked for some kind of conflict between us so that I could attack him or push him away but there was none. I was paralyzed by my inability to process this. I was paralyzed by my inability to find fault in this man. I wanted to reject him. I wanted to discard him but sadly he'd given me no reason to do so and it confused me, numbed me. If I couldn't get mad at him, I couldn't repel him and if I couldn't repel him, I was helpless.

"Turn over for me, babe," he instructed, huskily. I did and angled my butt upward. I knew I somewhat liked Elias but I couldn't figure out if I had actual feelings for him or if it was just the sex. I guess time will tell. I'd given up fighting his advances. Actually, I looked forward to the show ending so we could meet. We could hardly be alone without our lust taking over. Together, we were insatiable and almost inseparable.

Elias mounted me from behind, grabbing my hips. What started as slow, long strokes turned into a deep, hard pounding with each thrust punctuated by my sharp intakes of breath. His moans were louder and with more passion than I'd ever heard from him before. We were both close so I pushed my hips back in perfect coordination to match each of his thrusts. My orgasm hit as I tightened around him which sent him over the edge. Elias stiffened, burying  himself deep inside of me, and began to spasm.

"Oh shit!" Elias muttered as he pulled out.  

"What?" I turned my neck slightly.

"Lay, don't panic but the condom broke," he said and that's when I felt the slickness inside of me. I frantically flipped over onto my back, staring at the ring of latex around the base of him. "Fuck, that's why it felt so intense toward the end. You're on birth control, right?" 

I took a deep breath, trying to remain calm

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I took a deep breath, trying to remain calm. "Now it's your turn to not panic. I ran out on Friday and was too busy to get a refill. I didn't think I needed to rush because we use protection anyway."

"

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