Lovesick

21

Olivia didn't know what was going on.

One moment she was on cloud nine and the next she's left alone on a street, next to a diner with the most tantalising scents.

But she knew better.

That diner served garbage. Just like how she felt at that moment.

Why did he just leave her and run away? What did she do wrong?

She had no clue. None at all.

She knew he lied. Hell, they stay right next to each other! They could have easily gone home together.

Yet he lied and ran away, in the opposite direction. Leaving her to unkind thought and doubts that persisted and grew as she walked on home. Alone.

It's been getting more frequent. She noted.

Their dates would start out awkwardly. She found it cute how he took awhile to get his bearings and then they have fun.

They would get cosy and just soak up the feeling of joy lingering around them, intoxicating and refreshing.

Then naturally, they get closer. It's simple. It's a date. With a guy she whom she finds hot. They have chemistry, she can feel it. They somehow click.

Yet, whenever they get close to intimacy, he would hide tail and bail on her.

She thought it's a case of cold feet. Maybe she had been wrong. Maybe he didn't really see her the way she did him.

Maybe she was moving too quick?

She wished he would talk to her about it. She waited.

But now? Now she realized that he wouldn't. She would have to bring it up herself. Before her doubts and insecurities would cloud her mind and judgement.

***
"What's up? I thought you said you would be busy today?"

"Yeah, I thought so too. But here I am."

A hand clasped hers, "Oli, you okay?"

"I don't know Deb." She muttered. Taking away her hand, she covered her face.

Heaving out a sigh, she looked at Deborah.

"You want to talk about it?"

She nodded, "Yeah. Yeah. Talking. I think that would be good."

"Fine. Spill."

And so she did. She may have left out some of the finer details but she made sure to mention what she felt the problem was.

"-and I'm not sure what it is."

Deborah just sighed at that.

"Deb, tell me. Do you think, no, should I..."

"Hush. I don't think you should start blaming yourself here."

Letting out a frustrated groan she looked at her drink. Triple shot espresso might not be the best thing to have right now but she didn't care.

Taking her coffee, she gulped it down and relaxed agaisnt the seat, Deborah grimacing at her. "You're filthy. Maybe that's what it is."

"Ha ha very funny."

"No, you said he bailed after you left the diner yeah? He must have seen the way you maul at your food and decided to high tail it before you chomp on him." She paused to make a grab for her chin, "that guy must be pretty smart."

Olivia laughed at that, "I get it, I'm being silly and needlessly paranoid."

"Damn right. So just relax, get to work. Live your life and when you get the chance, talk to him."

Olivia nodded. Talking, that she can do. It's not like she could say anything worse than what she did when she first met him.

She's a train wreck. But one who deserves respect and honesty.